Only want advice of people over 23yrs old. I can't find a solution. ?

I met my gf on the internet. I really do love her. I was single for so long I didn't give value to my actions.


While we were together I was still contacting other people and sending dirty pics of me to them. I was doing it for entertainment and didn't even get many responses back. I WAS NOT PLANNING OR EVER GOING TO CHEAT. Truly, I just liked the attention knowing someone was attracted to me. Also I was looking at alot of dirty profile pics.


Now, she invaded my privacy and I wasn't being honest. I understand what I was doing wasn't right and I would have reacted the same way if I caught her doing the same. But I forgave her for invading my privacy and she obviously forgave me for doing what I did.


Since then we are very sweet to each other. I gave her my word that I wouldn't do anything like that again, and I haven't. But every other day or anytime we have a small argument she throws it in my face.


Also, I am accused constantly of checking out women whenever we go out, even if I glance at a woman walking in my direction.





I understand she's not gonna get over it anytime soon and I am gonna have to rebuild her confidence in me, but how? I am a man and there are beautiful women everywhere. I'm not breaking my neck to check anyone out, but I'm not gonna stare at the floor like an abused woman scared of her man....lol.





PLEASE HELP!!Only want advice of people over 23yrs old. I can't find a solution. ?
Sounds like excuses because maybe you don't really like her as much as you keep telling yourself you do.





Desperation makes you do dumb things - like start to date someone you have no respect for.





If you did have respect, she wouldn't HAVE to worry about these things, and neither would you.





If she was really worth it, to you, it wouldn't be THAT hard to stop.





Gaining her trust back is easy, as actions speak louder then words, show her more often how you feel about her (cuddles, kisses and spending time together)Only want advice of people over 23yrs old. I can't find a solution. ?
I think that you have to ask yourself if you really want to be in a relationship at this point in your life. When im with someone i really want to be with and someone i really want to make happy i dont stop checking out guys but i dont do it when my boyfriend is standing right there. Thats just disrespect.... how would you feel if she was checking out all the hot guys walking around right in front of your face?.... The way that shes reacting to you sounds like a few things i could relate to... either


1.) she hasnt really forgiven you about incident with the photos ( you did betray her trust and regaining her trust will take time)


2.) she is a very possessive woman and needs to take a chill pill


3.) she is hurt by your lack of respect for her feelings





and when i say that i mean if you cant notice that when you are checking out all these other women right in front of her face you might as well be sleeping with all of them because thats the sense of betrayal shes feeling with you regardless of if your cheating or not.... its still hurtful that she is just not enough for you. you HAVE to be staring at every other good looking woman that walks by. do you have any idea what you must be doing to her self esteem?... if i were you i would really consider if you want to be with this woman.. and if you do start being a man about it and BE WITH HER. go ahead.. look at other women.. (its only looking) but not right in front of her face. Thats just plain rude.
Tell her to stop throwing it back in your face, she needs to move on and trust you





What I don't understand though is who you were sending dirty pics to? There's not many women who would want a stranger to send them dirty pics. Are you sure they weren't men who wanted the pics?
sounds like you're not ready to be in a committed relationship.





also, you need to know that grass is not always greener, which is hard to find out if you havent dated around first.





i say, stop with the dirty pics and addiction to internet/porn, and start meeting REAL people.





go solo for a while. sow your wild oats.
Here's the thing. Remember how it felt when you were single? If you really like this woman, treat her and yourself with some respect. Look her in the eyes when you tell her you love her. Hug her. Let her know how important she is in your life and mean it. If you can't do any of these things, you're only kidding yourself. I can assure you, although I don't know you, if you were not with a woman you would not have other women showing interest in you. More important, your letting your ego or ';machismo'; screw up your relationship with this girl. Do the right thing.
assure her you aren't checking out other people.





eventually she will have something else to throw in your face (us women like to switch it up yanno)





when in public, make her feel special, cause she obviously doesn't. hold her hand, and kiss her cheak. she will eventually get out of the ';hes checking out girls in public'; stage.
If you want her to get over it, then you must make sure that you make a real effort to show her that you are NOT looking at other women, no comments, and no eye contact with other women. Women have eyes in the back of their head and can sense you looking, not only that, but she will watch you, just to catch you. Throwing it in your face means it is NOT resolved and it seems like you both have some issues to deal with. I am married to a man, and he has never made me feel like his is looking at other women even if he does, I don't know about it and don't really care. Once you break that trust, it will be along time before it is restored, and that is the price you pay for being naughty.
I've been her before. The whole invasion of privacy and everything. It's going to take a while, just get used to the fact. I take it you're in your 20's? and she is too right? This happened to me once in my 20's and once in my 30's. I handled it much better in my 30's. It takes a very mature person to be able to put it behind them. I still get tempted to bring it up every time we have an argument, but I don't. All it does is make things worse. I know my husband checks out other women in my presence, do I see him doing it? Never! He's really good! He knows how to do it inconspicuously, I do admit I help him do this. Because like you said, there are many beautiful women and you guys are just wired to admire us. I suggest that you try to not to let her see you looking. She will notice and appreciate the effort. You don't have to look at the ground, just not at another woman. As for the the bringing up, just as her to simply stop. It's not getting you anywhere. When you ask her this make sure that it is not in the middle of an argument. This may or may not work. The next time she brings it up, just don't even respond. Just shake your head and walk away. Don't try to argue back, just walk away. After two or three times of this, she will stop.