A friend of mine was having some marital problems with her husband, a little similar as mine, she asked for my help and I advised her what to do. That was 2 weeks ago, today she wrote to me how much I helped her, and that I am a good friend and her husband is trying to change a lot for her...
I am very happy for her. Good for her.
But how did I give an advice to someone, and I can't advise myself about what to do?
does anyone feel the same?
Thanks all.Have you ever felt that you can give great advices to people but you can never work out your own problems?
well i do feel the same,just because we have the same problem does not mean we feel the same way about the probelm.
that's why the advise could be more usefull for somebody else.
in other sense 1st we have different people involved.they think,feel differently there for the result as well different. Have you ever felt that you can give great advices to people but you can never work out your own problems?
I don't really feel the same way, but I know a lot of people who do. Ironically marriage counselors have the highest divorce rate, and psychologists have a particularly high suicide rate. It's ironic that those that help others with their problems often don't pay any attention to their own issues or have the ability to fix their problems. I'm a couples counselor, by the way, but I'm happy to report my life is a-okay. Great marriage, no suicide risk here, lol.
When you give advice to others you are somewhat emotionally removed from the situation and can look objectively. When you are knee deep in the situation you can't see the forest through the trees.
Our problems are unique...and you may know exactly what to do...may even have done it...but it does take two to resolve any marital issues and some men are more willing and able to adapt and change than others....keep thinking...keep helping others..and hang in there
That is because we can think more objectively about someone else's problems and when it comes to our own, our feelings get thrown into the mix.
I feel that way all the time. It's because your not on the outside looking in, therefor you can't be as logical.
Just be grateful/thankful that you've helped! Its better than knowing the answer to everything.
sometimes it happened same to you... sometimes we can advise others because we experience it.
Every single day...
Maybe you know what to do but don't want to.
I hear ya... I'm the same way.
Yeah, and if you can read between the lines on this answer you can see how hard I try, but when it gets too close and personal my perspective goes blank. That is what happens to advice on yourself. It gets too distorted and I have a harder time trying to figure things out. Your objectivity gets clouded and the image is like you get too close with a camera the picture does not get as clear where you want the lines on the object to be razor sharp. The answer is harder to define. Yes I do agree with your question, but how great my advice might be or if it's good, I only feel that way if the asker realizes the course to follow really helped in the long run. That they took the time to ask, I took the time to reflect and respond. Win Win all the way around. I will seek advice too, when my perspective is like that camera......
Yes! Definitely,I can really help give ppl advice about their situation almost any,Yet I keep mine with out ever being resolved.I am married for almost 12 yrs with 2 kids and feel Unhappy in my marriage,hubby and I argue alot and never resolved our problems,We then most of the time drop it and be ok again by him gossiping about other ppls problems,He like runs from ours.You seem like a good listener like I am.I rather hear ppls problems than say mine, but there comes a time that we, our minds can't take it anymore and start telling other ppl about out problems or situation like me now.I am Deppressive person and ppl would never ever guess that I am because they see me normal laughing but inside me it's different.I think I can be strong for others but crumbling down.I love helping ppl and kids by listening to them. I feel like a Councelor and ppl like talking to me alot.I wish I can become a Real Councelor or a child Physicatrist or a Teacher.I now have to deal with my own situations and actually have an appointment to a councelor/physicatrist this week,it's my turn to be counceled bc I Really needed.I have gone to counceling few yrs back and felt strange and thought I didn't need it and stopped it and now Realized I do need it.It is great to help ppl out but we need to listen to our selves and help our selves. :). Bye!
Monday, August 23, 2010
Older people r always giving us advice or telling us what 2 do. What advice would u like to give older people
I usually ask them for advice, except on the rare occasion an older person asks me for advice, and that is usually on computers or on gift ideas for a child or grandchild (what do young people like these days?)
Did an older people ask you for advice? About what?Older people r always giving us advice or telling us what 2 do. What advice would u like to give older people
As an older person I would like to remind other older people to enjoy every day; they're growing few.Older people r always giving us advice or telling us what 2 do. What advice would u like to give older people
To ';older'; people:
Try to remember your adolescent and early adulthood years. When you think you have a clear picture of that, add every imaginable evil to your world. Then try to imagine how you would handle the temptations and peer pressure in those situations. Once you have a clear picture of this, SPEAK UP!
I have come to realize that my children, ages 9-21 are going through exponentially more than even I did as a young person, and that I went through exponentially more than my parents went through.
Older People: Always strive to help our children cope! Don't claim not to understand young people. Work towards getting values back to the way they were in your time! - God Bless!
As a 'senior', I think I can answer this. Sometimes the 'advice' that an older person gives, is'nt advice at all, just a sharing of experiences of his or her life, and how that person handled those experiences. GETTING OLD is a process that includes lots of 'ups' and 'downs', but BEING OLD does'nt give license to being obnoxious and rude. ( though you might want to cut some slack to Granny.)
I'm on the fence on this question. I believe that older people give us advice because they've been there and done that. We tend to take advice wrong because we (as youngins) think we know everything. I never thought my mother knew what she was talking about. I hated everthing she told me. Then I got to an age when (bam!) I was like ';wow, mom was right about everything.'; Appreciate their wisdom. One day we will all be books full with knowledge and dying to share. Hopefully we'll find a young person like me that wants to listen, understand and apprectiate.
Did an older people ask you for advice? About what?Older people r always giving us advice or telling us what 2 do. What advice would u like to give older people
As an older person I would like to remind other older people to enjoy every day; they're growing few.Older people r always giving us advice or telling us what 2 do. What advice would u like to give older people
To ';older'; people:
Try to remember your adolescent and early adulthood years. When you think you have a clear picture of that, add every imaginable evil to your world. Then try to imagine how you would handle the temptations and peer pressure in those situations. Once you have a clear picture of this, SPEAK UP!
I have come to realize that my children, ages 9-21 are going through exponentially more than even I did as a young person, and that I went through exponentially more than my parents went through.
Older People: Always strive to help our children cope! Don't claim not to understand young people. Work towards getting values back to the way they were in your time! - God Bless!
As a 'senior', I think I can answer this. Sometimes the 'advice' that an older person gives, is'nt advice at all, just a sharing of experiences of his or her life, and how that person handled those experiences. GETTING OLD is a process that includes lots of 'ups' and 'downs', but BEING OLD does'nt give license to being obnoxious and rude. ( though you might want to cut some slack to Granny.)
I'm on the fence on this question. I believe that older people give us advice because they've been there and done that. We tend to take advice wrong because we (as youngins) think we know everything. I never thought my mother knew what she was talking about. I hated everthing she told me. Then I got to an age when (bam!) I was like ';wow, mom was right about everything.'; Appreciate their wisdom. One day we will all be books full with knowledge and dying to share. Hopefully we'll find a young person like me that wants to listen, understand and apprectiate.
Do celebs in interviews give the right advice to young people or are they just setting bad examples for us????
I think celebrities should just tell the truth about their advice, not make up lame false advice that they don't take.Do celebs in interviews give the right advice to young people or are they just setting bad examples for us????
celebs are there to entertain... not to change anyones life.
celebs are there to entertain... not to change anyones life.
Why do people ask for advice but never take it?
i do this. i dont know why. maybe fear of what would happen or maybe just not ready for that big move. whats ur opinion?Why do people ask for advice but never take it?
Sometimes it's just good to hear other peoples opinion especially if you're not sure of your own .Why do people ask for advice but never take it?
Because people often aren't really looking for advice when they ask for it. They're usually looking for someone else to validate whatever it is that they've already decided for themselves. If they receive advice that is contrary to their decision, the ignore it and proceed with the plan they had in the back of their mind all along.
What is the difference between ANGEL and human being ?Angels are fine but can do only as directed .Human beings are born free and independent and can perform vivid and independent activities .Give fine advice and guidence and never worry for it if not taken as directed as there is independent thinking give abundently to this human kind .Never stop giving advice as all are enquiring about a little bit of truth .Who knows which is true .Thank you for putting a fine question for yahoo readers .
I think usually when people seek advice, what they are really seeking is validation - or in other words - they want the other person's advice to agree with what they already know their choice will be.
An old saying goes ';A mind convinced against it's will, is of the same opinion still.';
Because people are always looking for someone else's view of their situation. Maybe it's to prove to themselves that it is as bad or as good as they think it is. Sometimes, I think people do it to showoff.
And here's the link you asked for from your other question :)
www.militaryonesource.com
I rarely ask for advice these days. My only advice to you is to follow your gut instinct, it's usually right. Only you know yourself and what you are capable of. Just go with the flow of life, whatever happens will happen - good and bad.
people take the advice from many and then summarize it as per their own mindset and then take actions. this is the right way of taking any decision
How do you know that people dont take the advice they are given?
people don't like to be told what to do.............and they will ultimately do whatever they want to do. lol
because we are all stupid and even if the person is closer to us than anyone else they still cant relate
Sometimes it's just good to hear other peoples opinion especially if you're not sure of your own .Why do people ask for advice but never take it?
Because people often aren't really looking for advice when they ask for it. They're usually looking for someone else to validate whatever it is that they've already decided for themselves. If they receive advice that is contrary to their decision, the ignore it and proceed with the plan they had in the back of their mind all along.
What is the difference between ANGEL and human being ?Angels are fine but can do only as directed .Human beings are born free and independent and can perform vivid and independent activities .Give fine advice and guidence and never worry for it if not taken as directed as there is independent thinking give abundently to this human kind .Never stop giving advice as all are enquiring about a little bit of truth .Who knows which is true .Thank you for putting a fine question for yahoo readers .
I think usually when people seek advice, what they are really seeking is validation - or in other words - they want the other person's advice to agree with what they already know their choice will be.
An old saying goes ';A mind convinced against it's will, is of the same opinion still.';
Because people are always looking for someone else's view of their situation. Maybe it's to prove to themselves that it is as bad or as good as they think it is. Sometimes, I think people do it to showoff.
And here's the link you asked for from your other question :)
www.militaryonesource.com
I rarely ask for advice these days. My only advice to you is to follow your gut instinct, it's usually right. Only you know yourself and what you are capable of. Just go with the flow of life, whatever happens will happen - good and bad.
people take the advice from many and then summarize it as per their own mindset and then take actions. this is the right way of taking any decision
How do you know that people dont take the advice they are given?
people don't like to be told what to do.............and they will ultimately do whatever they want to do. lol
because we are all stupid and even if the person is closer to us than anyone else they still cant relate
Hey people need advice?
i'm 21years of age, im not happy with my body so i wanna get in shape but how!! how long take and there are any healthy choices for improvement of body.Hey people need advice?
Well, you don't give particulars on what's wrong with your body. Please be more speciffic (add details) so we might helpHey people need advice?
I guess you should eat healthy and exercise.
if u r ova weight u should loose the weight by taking a walk every morning, eating healthy food and choose wisely wat u eat.
The holidays can be stressful... and unfortunately, many people reach for food as comfort. If you find yourself regularly eating in response to stress, anxiety, sadness, boredom, anger, loneliness, relationship problems, or poor self-esteem, try to break the habit with some of my strategies below.
Learn to recognize your hunger. Before you automatically pop something into your mouth, rate your hunger on a scale of 1 to 5 -- 1 being ravenous and 5 being full. Make every effort to avoid eating when your hunger is a 4 or a 5.
Find alternatives to eating. Make a personal list of activities you can do instead of eating. Perhaps go for a walk, call a friend, listen to music, take a hot shower/bath, exercise, clean your house, polish your nails, surf the Internet, schedule outstanding appointments, watch television, look through a photo album, etc.
Keep a food journal. Logging your food will help to identify your toughest timeframes. It also will make you accountable... so perhaps you'll be less apt to reach for unnecessary food.
Three-food interference. Make the commitment to first eat three specific healthy foods before starting on caloric comfort foods (i.e., an apple, handful of baby carrots and a yogurt). If after that, you still want to continue with your comfort foods, give yourself permission. However, most of the time, the three foods are enough to stop you from moving on.
Exercise regularly. Daily exercise relieves stress and puts you in a positive mindset, which provides greater strength to pass on the unhealthy fare.
Get enough sleep. Research shows that sleep deprivation can increase hunger by decreasing Leptin levels, the appetite regulating hormone that signals fullness. With adequate sleep, you'll also be less tired and have more resolve to fight off the urge to grab foods for comfort.
Eating right and exercise are the two best things to do. Eat your largest meal in the morning and your smallest at night. Low carb diets starve your body of the nutrients it needs, so if you are looking to be healthy, or to build lean muscle mass, don't go that route. If you are overweight you should start by doing a lot of cardio. I would suggest an elliptical machine or treadmill. You need to do no less than twenty minutes, no less than thirty is preferable. It is after 20-30 minutes that the body begins to burn fat. Good luck!
Well, you don't give particulars on what's wrong with your body. Please be more speciffic (add details) so we might helpHey people need advice?
I guess you should eat healthy and exercise.
if u r ova weight u should loose the weight by taking a walk every morning, eating healthy food and choose wisely wat u eat.
The holidays can be stressful... and unfortunately, many people reach for food as comfort. If you find yourself regularly eating in response to stress, anxiety, sadness, boredom, anger, loneliness, relationship problems, or poor self-esteem, try to break the habit with some of my strategies below.
Learn to recognize your hunger. Before you automatically pop something into your mouth, rate your hunger on a scale of 1 to 5 -- 1 being ravenous and 5 being full. Make every effort to avoid eating when your hunger is a 4 or a 5.
Find alternatives to eating. Make a personal list of activities you can do instead of eating. Perhaps go for a walk, call a friend, listen to music, take a hot shower/bath, exercise, clean your house, polish your nails, surf the Internet, schedule outstanding appointments, watch television, look through a photo album, etc.
Keep a food journal. Logging your food will help to identify your toughest timeframes. It also will make you accountable... so perhaps you'll be less apt to reach for unnecessary food.
Three-food interference. Make the commitment to first eat three specific healthy foods before starting on caloric comfort foods (i.e., an apple, handful of baby carrots and a yogurt). If after that, you still want to continue with your comfort foods, give yourself permission. However, most of the time, the three foods are enough to stop you from moving on.
Exercise regularly. Daily exercise relieves stress and puts you in a positive mindset, which provides greater strength to pass on the unhealthy fare.
Get enough sleep. Research shows that sleep deprivation can increase hunger by decreasing Leptin levels, the appetite regulating hormone that signals fullness. With adequate sleep, you'll also be less tired and have more resolve to fight off the urge to grab foods for comfort.
Eating right and exercise are the two best things to do. Eat your largest meal in the morning and your smallest at night. Low carb diets starve your body of the nutrients it needs, so if you are looking to be healthy, or to build lean muscle mass, don't go that route. If you are overweight you should start by doing a lot of cardio. I would suggest an elliptical machine or treadmill. You need to do no less than twenty minutes, no less than thirty is preferable. It is after 20-30 minutes that the body begins to burn fat. Good luck!
I like to help people (mainly with problems, advice, and any other help) I like to shop and i love fashion...?
What career options should i look for, what should i major in?
I am very undecisive and will be a junior in college this semester...I was a marketing major but I changed it because I felt I was a little shy for a career in that...Now I switched it to English, secondary education but i don't think I would enjoy that either...any suggestions...I'd appreciate if I only recieve SERIOUS answers please.I like to help people (mainly with problems, advice, and any other help) I like to shop and i love fashion...?
well i had a friend like you. she loved fashion and shopping so i belive her major was claled fashion merchandising. Which is basically marketing and economic based. I don't know where you go to school but check out their curriculum and see. Whatever you chose its ideal to have a solid background in something else. A background in business or marketing can not hurt you. But its up to you to make your degree work for you. Its justa paper after all, lifeless, yet so meaningfulI like to help people (mainly with problems, advice, and any other help) I like to shop and i love fashion...?
that is exactly what i like to do. i love giving advice and i love fashion. a career that is really good for both those things is to be an image consultant. people would come to you and pay you to tell them how to dress better. this career has advice in it mixed with fashion.
an idea of what image consultants really do: watch TLC's What Not to Wear with Stancy London and Clinton Kelly
SINCE YOU LIKE TO HELP PEOPLE A CAREER IN HUMAN SERVICES CAN COVER A ENTIRE FIELD OF HELPING OTHERS. I WORK IN A MENTAL HEALTH CLINIC AND THEY CAN ALWAYS USE PEOPLE THAT HAVE A KNACK FOR HELPING OTHERS. UNLESS YOU PLAN ON BEING A CLOTHES DESIGNER I WOULD SAY LEAVE THE SHOPPING AND FASHION AS A HOBBY OR A PAST TIME FAVORITE!!!! GOOD LUCK IN WHATEVER CAREER PATH YOU DECIDE TO ATTAIN.pink blush
I am very undecisive and will be a junior in college this semester...I was a marketing major but I changed it because I felt I was a little shy for a career in that...Now I switched it to English, secondary education but i don't think I would enjoy that either...any suggestions...I'd appreciate if I only recieve SERIOUS answers please.I like to help people (mainly with problems, advice, and any other help) I like to shop and i love fashion...?
well i had a friend like you. she loved fashion and shopping so i belive her major was claled fashion merchandising. Which is basically marketing and economic based. I don't know where you go to school but check out their curriculum and see. Whatever you chose its ideal to have a solid background in something else. A background in business or marketing can not hurt you. But its up to you to make your degree work for you. Its justa paper after all, lifeless, yet so meaningfulI like to help people (mainly with problems, advice, and any other help) I like to shop and i love fashion...?
that is exactly what i like to do. i love giving advice and i love fashion. a career that is really good for both those things is to be an image consultant. people would come to you and pay you to tell them how to dress better. this career has advice in it mixed with fashion.
an idea of what image consultants really do: watch TLC's What Not to Wear with Stancy London and Clinton Kelly
SINCE YOU LIKE TO HELP PEOPLE A CAREER IN HUMAN SERVICES CAN COVER A ENTIRE FIELD OF HELPING OTHERS. I WORK IN A MENTAL HEALTH CLINIC AND THEY CAN ALWAYS USE PEOPLE THAT HAVE A KNACK FOR HELPING OTHERS. UNLESS YOU PLAN ON BEING A CLOTHES DESIGNER I WOULD SAY LEAVE THE SHOPPING AND FASHION AS A HOBBY OR A PAST TIME FAVORITE!!!! GOOD LUCK IN WHATEVER CAREER PATH YOU DECIDE TO ATTAIN.
I need some other people's advice as well please?
I have a very suicidal friend who is strongly considering suicide. I have already tried to talk him through everything and said everything I can think of already. I have just recently lost a friend to suicide and do not want to lose this one too. Is there anything I can do at all to change a person's mind that has already been made up. Is there a way to commit him to a clinic even if he is already 18. Does anyone know what I can do to keep from losing this one?I need some other people's advice as well please?
if he's a danger to himself he can be committed to a clinic for a certain amount of hours against his will. tell this person's parents, friends, everyone! talk to the friend straight out (i'm sure you have.. but be sure not to skirt the issue. you can't make the situation worse and it won't drive him to kill himself any more than he wants to already). do everything you can. make SURE he gets help. don't worry about losing his friendship.I need some other people's advice as well please?
Have you talked to this friends parents and family? Even though your friend is 18 his family can have him committed This is to much for you to be handling on your own, ask family for help, if you cant talk to him parents maybe your parents can.
call the police and say that he has made threats of harming himself. Lie if you must, but do whatever it takes for them to consider him a threat to himself.
first thing you should do is to talk to his parents.if you are still in school talk to a counselor for help and you could call the suicide prevention.don't waste time you should do all of this now
if he's a danger to himself he can be committed to a clinic for a certain amount of hours against his will. tell this person's parents, friends, everyone! talk to the friend straight out (i'm sure you have.. but be sure not to skirt the issue. you can't make the situation worse and it won't drive him to kill himself any more than he wants to already). do everything you can. make SURE he gets help. don't worry about losing his friendship.I need some other people's advice as well please?
Have you talked to this friends parents and family? Even though your friend is 18 his family can have him committed This is to much for you to be handling on your own, ask family for help, if you cant talk to him parents maybe your parents can.
call the police and say that he has made threats of harming himself. Lie if you must, but do whatever it takes for them to consider him a threat to himself.
first thing you should do is to talk to his parents.if you are still in school talk to a counselor for help and you could call the suicide prevention.don't waste time you should do all of this now
Why do people give thumbs down to good advice...and thumbs up for terrible advice?
I'm wasting 5 points just to ask if there is anyone out there who feels the same way as I do. I've seen so many sarcastic, unhelpful, and alot of the time, unsafe answers get thumbs up. While well thought out answers get a big ol' thumbs down.
For example. A teen was describing bulimia and asking for help on how to lose weight. Why on earth would you give someone a thumbs up for suggesting starvation or crash dieting?
Real people put up these questions...why would anyone want to suggest something that would harm that person?Why do people give thumbs down to good advice...and thumbs up for terrible advice?
Some people think they are being cute or funny with snide/dumb remarks. Others don't realize that their could be awful consequences for things they say and do online.
I think some people just get their kicks by driving other people nuts and getting them all fired up. I seldom give a thumbs down, everyone has different opinions on how things should be handled. Unfortunately some on here will give a thumbs down simply because you don't agree with their point of view.Why do people give thumbs down to good advice...and thumbs up for terrible advice?
UNFORTUNATELY, THAT'S HOW THE INTERNET WORKS SOMETIMES. PEOPLE ARE BRAVER TO TYPE IN HARMFUL WORDS OR SUGGESTIONS WHEN THEY ARE HIDING BEHIND A MONITOR AND A KEYBOARD THAN THEY ARE IN REAL LIFE.
AND CLIQUE PHENOMENON IS THRIVES IN THIS KIND OF FORUMS.
Reed 7403 gave an excellent answer. I agree with him 100%. Some people just think they are being funny.
Getting side tracked from your question a bit. People on this site don't realise how naive some people are. It may be all fun and games to some of them but to those few who are reaching out for good advice it could be a matter of life and death. If someone asks a question on health issues I tell them to go to the doctor or clinic and also suggest that they DO NOT take advice from anyone on this site when it concerns their health. It's not safe. Even if the person is a health care professional, they should not be giving advice to someone they have not seen in person. If I tell them something that happened to me and what I did for it, they should still go see a doctor for themselves because everyone is different. What works for one may not work for someone else.
Also, I get upset when I see Best Answer given to really stupid non-sensical advice when other answers hit the question right on the head. Some people only want to hear what they want to hear and will gravitate to those that think like them. They do not want to listen to anything different and only want to listen to someone who is agreeing with them.
For example. A teen was describing bulimia and asking for help on how to lose weight. Why on earth would you give someone a thumbs up for suggesting starvation or crash dieting?
Real people put up these questions...why would anyone want to suggest something that would harm that person?Why do people give thumbs down to good advice...and thumbs up for terrible advice?
Some people think they are being cute or funny with snide/dumb remarks. Others don't realize that their could be awful consequences for things they say and do online.
I think some people just get their kicks by driving other people nuts and getting them all fired up. I seldom give a thumbs down, everyone has different opinions on how things should be handled. Unfortunately some on here will give a thumbs down simply because you don't agree with their point of view.Why do people give thumbs down to good advice...and thumbs up for terrible advice?
UNFORTUNATELY, THAT'S HOW THE INTERNET WORKS SOMETIMES. PEOPLE ARE BRAVER TO TYPE IN HARMFUL WORDS OR SUGGESTIONS WHEN THEY ARE HIDING BEHIND A MONITOR AND A KEYBOARD THAN THEY ARE IN REAL LIFE.
AND CLIQUE PHENOMENON IS THRIVES IN THIS KIND OF FORUMS.
Reed 7403 gave an excellent answer. I agree with him 100%. Some people just think they are being funny.
Getting side tracked from your question a bit. People on this site don't realise how naive some people are. It may be all fun and games to some of them but to those few who are reaching out for good advice it could be a matter of life and death. If someone asks a question on health issues I tell them to go to the doctor or clinic and also suggest that they DO NOT take advice from anyone on this site when it concerns their health. It's not safe. Even if the person is a health care professional, they should not be giving advice to someone they have not seen in person. If I tell them something that happened to me and what I did for it, they should still go see a doctor for themselves because everyone is different. What works for one may not work for someone else.
Also, I get upset when I see Best Answer given to really stupid non-sensical advice when other answers hit the question right on the head. Some people only want to hear what they want to hear and will gravitate to those that think like them. They do not want to listen to anything different and only want to listen to someone who is agreeing with them.
Why are some people so determined to give everybody advice........?
....on how to run there livesWhy are some people so determined to give everybody advice........?
Superiority, Dominance,and last but not least ,a sincere desire of a fellow human being to be helpful.. The last has always been mine.. The sincere people may know you ,like or love you, and are only trying to keep or set you on the right path.. Strangers who are sincere, see your issue as one they have either experienced, or have knowledge of your position,and are trying to help you past this ';bump'; in the road.. Sometimes,it not easy for us to swallow our pride,that we feel we have our own answers, and we become stubborn.. Accept the advice, and think about it,what do you have to lose?? Reject it, if you feel its not in your best interest.. Your in command,and will have to deal with your decisions..Life is a growing experience.. Hopefully ,someday, someone will need good advice, and YOU will step up to the plate,and maybe,just maybe, YOU may make a difference in someones life.. Its a great feeling, when you have done something for someone, and the results are positive for THEM.. You receive the greatest reward!! The other two reasons for giving advice, are for the person who is giving it.. You may sometimes have to accept it ,such as in employment.. But be secure in the thought, you are not like them, and continue on your path of life..Your future is yours.. Live it!! Good Luck!! SOLOMONWhy are some people so determined to give everybody advice........?
why are some people so determined to ask for it??
well if someone posts a question, whats the problem with offering a possible solution and a little bit of advice? you just asked a question,in turn you will get answers,but nobody is trying to run your life...
Because people see others heading for trouble based on real life experience. They hope that their advice will help the object of their comments to avoid getting into this trouble - or, being in it, how to get out of it with the least amount of hurt.
Is that not the same reason people answer questions that are being asked here? Look at how many people are at level 7 where they have answered over 50,000 questions. You have to be pretty determined to take the time to respond to that many pleas for help.
THEY THINK THEY HAVE A BETTER HANDLE ON THE SITUATION THAN THEY THINK YOU HAVE . HEAR THEM OUT MAYBE THEY DO , MAYBE NOT . IN SOME CASES I GIVE ADVICE FROM THE PERCEPTIVE -----BEEN THERE DONE THAT AND SCREWED UP DOING THE EXACT SAME THING YOUR TRYING TO DO . HEAR THEM OUT --------THERE'S A WORD OF WISDOM SOMETIMES EVEN FROM THE VILLAGE IDIOT
At first i had a simple answer for this question, but once i saw the details, all i can say is because they Don't appreciate their own lives, some want to be the spot light of every ones life around them, some are know it alls, some people cant mind their own business, some people feel a sense of power out of the attempt, i can go on, all i know is the intention is never good, i have known people who were like this, and i ended the friendship with them for that, its good to give advice and let the person take it or leave, but you should never tell people how to run their lives, its an insult.
Why not?
If the people DIDN'T want advice on their life then they wouldn't post question about it. And if they didn't post a question about life and how to work it then answers offering advice about that can be safely ignored...
Just pushy.
LOL... cause we have nothing better to do, on top of that it's kinda funny to see how screwed up everone else is, lol! I know thats mean! Oh, and I'm at work and have nothing better to do, lol!
because people are nice and want to help and care about others! I know this is true for me. I found Scientology to be the help I knew I always needed, and I love letting others know about it. I found ways to study more effectively and understand more of what I read, so I think any knowledge that's useful should be passed along!
Makes them feel wanted and useful. (that wasn't advice by the way) :)
thinking that at least you may make use of it..
Superiority, Dominance,and last but not least ,a sincere desire of a fellow human being to be helpful.. The last has always been mine.. The sincere people may know you ,like or love you, and are only trying to keep or set you on the right path.. Strangers who are sincere, see your issue as one they have either experienced, or have knowledge of your position,and are trying to help you past this ';bump'; in the road.. Sometimes,it not easy for us to swallow our pride,that we feel we have our own answers, and we become stubborn.. Accept the advice, and think about it,what do you have to lose?? Reject it, if you feel its not in your best interest.. Your in command,and will have to deal with your decisions..Life is a growing experience.. Hopefully ,someday, someone will need good advice, and YOU will step up to the plate,and maybe,just maybe, YOU may make a difference in someones life.. Its a great feeling, when you have done something for someone, and the results are positive for THEM.. You receive the greatest reward!! The other two reasons for giving advice, are for the person who is giving it.. You may sometimes have to accept it ,such as in employment.. But be secure in the thought, you are not like them, and continue on your path of life..Your future is yours.. Live it!! Good Luck!! SOLOMONWhy are some people so determined to give everybody advice........?
why are some people so determined to ask for it??
well if someone posts a question, whats the problem with offering a possible solution and a little bit of advice? you just asked a question,in turn you will get answers,but nobody is trying to run your life...
Because people see others heading for trouble based on real life experience. They hope that their advice will help the object of their comments to avoid getting into this trouble - or, being in it, how to get out of it with the least amount of hurt.
Is that not the same reason people answer questions that are being asked here? Look at how many people are at level 7 where they have answered over 50,000 questions. You have to be pretty determined to take the time to respond to that many pleas for help.
THEY THINK THEY HAVE A BETTER HANDLE ON THE SITUATION THAN THEY THINK YOU HAVE . HEAR THEM OUT MAYBE THEY DO , MAYBE NOT . IN SOME CASES I GIVE ADVICE FROM THE PERCEPTIVE -----BEEN THERE DONE THAT AND SCREWED UP DOING THE EXACT SAME THING YOUR TRYING TO DO . HEAR THEM OUT --------THERE'S A WORD OF WISDOM SOMETIMES EVEN FROM THE VILLAGE IDIOT
At first i had a simple answer for this question, but once i saw the details, all i can say is because they Don't appreciate their own lives, some want to be the spot light of every ones life around them, some are know it alls, some people cant mind their own business, some people feel a sense of power out of the attempt, i can go on, all i know is the intention is never good, i have known people who were like this, and i ended the friendship with them for that, its good to give advice and let the person take it or leave, but you should never tell people how to run their lives, its an insult.
Why not?
If the people DIDN'T want advice on their life then they wouldn't post question about it. And if they didn't post a question about life and how to work it then answers offering advice about that can be safely ignored...
Just pushy.
LOL... cause we have nothing better to do, on top of that it's kinda funny to see how screwed up everone else is, lol! I know thats mean! Oh, and I'm at work and have nothing better to do, lol!
because people are nice and want to help and care about others! I know this is true for me. I found Scientology to be the help I knew I always needed, and I love letting others know about it. I found ways to study more effectively and understand more of what I read, so I think any knowledge that's useful should be passed along!
Makes them feel wanted and useful. (that wasn't advice by the way) :)
thinking that at least you may make use of it..
I have when people offer me advice...????How about you?????
i listen and then do want i wantI have when people offer me advice...????How about you?????
have whatI have when people offer me advice...????How about you?????
I don't mind if people want to give me advice, but i have a little system with it. I always listent o what they have to say, and if i think it will be useful I'll store it in my memory for future use. If, however, I think it's a bunch of old codswallop, it goes in one ear and out the other. But I always listen.
i nod my head - it looks like im actually listenin 2 how ever it is - mostly teachers - bt then i just do what i wnt unless it was really important of course
I hate it too, so if I were you - I'd just ignore them...
they want to help. its ur decision if u will hear them or not...
If it has anything to do with golf, I tell them I'm on the course to have fun and to drive my cart into the pond if I desire, and to leave me alone. I don't care about scores or my swing unless I'm on a date.
I hate it too, but I learned I have to stop putting my business out there for them to give me advice on
Yeah sure, like ';put down the weapon'; and ';step away from the edge';. Or even ';put that back in your pants please';. At least make it constructive.
Well, it depends on what I am going through at the time. As for me, people pay good money to get advice from me!
Yes I agree. I don't take advice from many. I don't have any to give
depends on if i ask them or not
I have.
but why go to yahoo answers to ask a question - it is in a way advise
it's always nice to hear someone Else's view. they might open up another door that you didn't see.
if you don't want to hear other peoples opinions, then why are you using yahoo answers? all you get is other peoples opinions!
my advice would be to ignore them, or clock them one on the snout.
That depends on what the advice is. If the advice is ';you should have bought a lot of Enron stock';, then it is NOT appreciated. If the advice is ';try not starting your lead guitar solos on the root note - it makes it more interesting';, then it IS appreciated. People are human - let them talk. Who knows - maybe someday one of them might come up with some brilliant advice for you that will make you a billionaire. You can listen, then ignore the advice that doesn't fit you.
Depends on what the subject is...If it's something that I think can benefit me, then i'll listen
I'd have to edit your statement to:
I hate ... people ...
It depends on who it is and what the advice is. I.e. a person with frizzy hair giving me advice on straighteners - won't work. Someone giving me advice on how to clean my conservatory roof without having to climb a lader -greatly appreciated. People offering advice just mean well, they are not out to get you. Most of the time anyway.
You ...';have';...what when people offer you advice???....let me tell you...if you have advice to offer me (of the nice kind) I would surely love to hear it someday....ta...thankx.....
I have bad spellers.
You don't need anyone's advice :o) ! Just encouragement! And praise. I don't like it either unless I ask for it!
I don't but sometimes I do. But..Who knows? Maybe when someone gives you an advice, it will be able to help you in some ways?
It all depends on: whether or not I've asked for it; how it's given (you ';SHOULD'; almost always puts me off); who's giving it (my best girlfriend -- yes! -- or my mother...errr....ahhhh...eeeeee) )and what kind of mood I'm in at any given moment.
Sometimes I get great advice. Whether or not I act on it is a whole other answer!
have whatI have when people offer me advice...????How about you?????
I don't mind if people want to give me advice, but i have a little system with it. I always listent o what they have to say, and if i think it will be useful I'll store it in my memory for future use. If, however, I think it's a bunch of old codswallop, it goes in one ear and out the other. But I always listen.
i nod my head - it looks like im actually listenin 2 how ever it is - mostly teachers - bt then i just do what i wnt unless it was really important of course
I hate it too, so if I were you - I'd just ignore them...
they want to help. its ur decision if u will hear them or not...
If it has anything to do with golf, I tell them I'm on the course to have fun and to drive my cart into the pond if I desire, and to leave me alone. I don't care about scores or my swing unless I'm on a date.
I hate it too, but I learned I have to stop putting my business out there for them to give me advice on
Yeah sure, like ';put down the weapon'; and ';step away from the edge';. Or even ';put that back in your pants please';. At least make it constructive.
Well, it depends on what I am going through at the time. As for me, people pay good money to get advice from me!
Yes I agree. I don't take advice from many. I don't have any to give
depends on if i ask them or not
I have.
but why go to yahoo answers to ask a question - it is in a way advise
it's always nice to hear someone Else's view. they might open up another door that you didn't see.
if you don't want to hear other peoples opinions, then why are you using yahoo answers? all you get is other peoples opinions!
my advice would be to ignore them, or clock them one on the snout.
That depends on what the advice is. If the advice is ';you should have bought a lot of Enron stock';, then it is NOT appreciated. If the advice is ';try not starting your lead guitar solos on the root note - it makes it more interesting';, then it IS appreciated. People are human - let them talk. Who knows - maybe someday one of them might come up with some brilliant advice for you that will make you a billionaire. You can listen, then ignore the advice that doesn't fit you.
Depends on what the subject is...If it's something that I think can benefit me, then i'll listen
I'd have to edit your statement to:
I hate ... people ...
It depends on who it is and what the advice is. I.e. a person with frizzy hair giving me advice on straighteners - won't work. Someone giving me advice on how to clean my conservatory roof without having to climb a lader -greatly appreciated. People offering advice just mean well, they are not out to get you. Most of the time anyway.
You ...';have';...what when people offer you advice???....let me tell you...if you have advice to offer me (of the nice kind) I would surely love to hear it someday....ta...thankx.....
I have bad spellers.
You don't need anyone's advice :o) ! Just encouragement! And praise. I don't like it either unless I ask for it!
I don't but sometimes I do. But..Who knows? Maybe when someone gives you an advice, it will be able to help you in some ways?
It all depends on: whether or not I've asked for it; how it's given (you ';SHOULD'; almost always puts me off); who's giving it (my best girlfriend -- yes! -- or my mother...errr....ahhhh...eeeeee) )and what kind of mood I'm in at any given moment.
Sometimes I get great advice. Whether or not I act on it is a whole other answer!
I need people's advice, please!!!?
ok theres diz girl dat i like a lot n we used to always talk, after i told her dat i like her she said dat it wouldnt ruin our friendship, yet now when i try to tlk 2 her we hardly ever tlk n thers silence. now all my friends keep asking me when im gonna ask her out. i've realized now dat i really luv her 2 much 2 just let her go. I want 2 tell her exactly how i feel 4 her n how it kills me 2 not be with her. What do i have to do 2 tell her, how would be a good way 2 tell her exactly how i feel. Im truly in luv wit her, but i dont think she knows how i truly feel. What's da best way 2 tell her??? Or how??????I need people's advice, please!!!?
You should definitely invite her to a place where the two of you can have a private conversation, but it should also be a place where she will feel comfortable with you. Tell her that you two can still be friends no matter what (if you truly feel that way), but let her know that you think she is very special and that you would like to be more than her friend if she is willing. Be prepared that she may not be interested and your feelings of love may turn to intense dislike. You are taking a risk, but at least you will know her true feelings.I need people's advice, please!!!?
kids puppy love will go away
Wellask her for a date.Don't tell her you love her. I mean that's too serious,to start.Just be together and let the relationship develop
Just let her go...She doesn't like you at all because if she likes you, she will not be cold with her dealings with you. Considering her actions towards you right now, nada, there is nothing that you can do about it. So, move on, dude.
Send her a real written letter with a flower or some of them. Do things at the right time.
Do not tell her you love her....That will scare her off.....right away..........Just be like you used to be before this got all confusing.... be real nice and ask her out.... like to a picnic that you planned...and just talk to her...... see how she feels..... Let it happen naturally......................good luck...
ask her to meet you somewhere special, maybe a place you first met or something romantic like, and tell her exactly what you just said.......if she won't listen this time she is TRUELY not worth you're time because you are obviously sweet,sensitive,and care about her
GOOD LUCK! =)
You should definitely invite her to a place where the two of you can have a private conversation, but it should also be a place where she will feel comfortable with you. Tell her that you two can still be friends no matter what (if you truly feel that way), but let her know that you think she is very special and that you would like to be more than her friend if she is willing. Be prepared that she may not be interested and your feelings of love may turn to intense dislike. You are taking a risk, but at least you will know her true feelings.I need people's advice, please!!!?
kids puppy love will go away
Wellask her for a date.Don't tell her you love her. I mean that's too serious,to start.Just be together and let the relationship develop
Just let her go...She doesn't like you at all because if she likes you, she will not be cold with her dealings with you. Considering her actions towards you right now, nada, there is nothing that you can do about it. So, move on, dude.
Send her a real written letter with a flower or some of them. Do things at the right time.
Do not tell her you love her....That will scare her off.....right away..........Just be like you used to be before this got all confusing.... be real nice and ask her out.... like to a picnic that you planned...and just talk to her...... see how she feels..... Let it happen naturally......................good luck...
ask her to meet you somewhere special, maybe a place you first met or something romantic like, and tell her exactly what you just said.......if she won't listen this time she is TRUELY not worth you're time because you are obviously sweet,sensitive,and care about her
GOOD LUCK! =)
POLL: Would you rather give people the wrong advice, hoping that it might be correct; or no advice, knowing..?
...it could possibly be incorrect? Neither?POLL: Would you rather give people the wrong advice, hoping that it might be correct; or no advice, knowing..?
It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool then to speak and remove all doubt.POLL: Would you rather give people the wrong advice, hoping that it might be correct; or no advice, knowing..?
If I didn't think my advice was good or helpful I would say so. I'd do my best to send the person seeking advice to someone who could help them, but I would never give advice that I thought could be wrong, my conscious couldn't take that.
I would never intentionally give someone the wrong advice. I will tell them what I do know and if it's an opinion, I will make it very clear that it is just my opinion.
I will answer anything random, but if a person is asking for legitimate help, I only answer if I know the right one.
You ask for advice from a few people then come to your own conclusion. Advice is only somebody else's opinion about what you should do.
Neither.
No advice, knowing. If I gave someone the wrong advice and screwed their lives, I'd get it back three times worse.
Advice is just that, I realize it may be wrong, I give it as much weight as an opinion. xox
i would hope any advice i give is taking with merit.
I would always give hugs and say ask on yahoo answers :P
i give my opinion...not my advice
therefore they can do what they please with it
=)pink blush
It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool then to speak and remove all doubt.POLL: Would you rather give people the wrong advice, hoping that it might be correct; or no advice, knowing..?
If I didn't think my advice was good or helpful I would say so. I'd do my best to send the person seeking advice to someone who could help them, but I would never give advice that I thought could be wrong, my conscious couldn't take that.
I would never intentionally give someone the wrong advice. I will tell them what I do know and if it's an opinion, I will make it very clear that it is just my opinion.
I will answer anything random, but if a person is asking for legitimate help, I only answer if I know the right one.
You ask for advice from a few people then come to your own conclusion. Advice is only somebody else's opinion about what you should do.
Neither.
No advice, knowing. If I gave someone the wrong advice and screwed their lives, I'd get it back three times worse.
Advice is just that, I realize it may be wrong, I give it as much weight as an opinion. xox
i would hope any advice i give is taking with merit.
I would always give hugs and say ask on yahoo answers :P
i give my opinion...not my advice
therefore they can do what they please with it
=)
Do you follow the advice from older people?
i.e. GrandparentsDo you follow the advice from older people?
Always WELL MOST OF THE TIMEDo you follow the advice from older people?
If I feel its good advice.
only when im having trouble making my own decisions...which is rarely..
=)
I used to.
I am one of the older people ! You don't do like I do! You do like I tell you to do!
yea, as long as i think its half good ill follow it from almost anyone :)
Yes l do.
Yes, I usually do, because they have more life experience and generally know more about things than I do.
hell no! bleh! lol. i'd rather learn lessons from own mistakes.
Sometimes
SOMETIMES THEY ARNT ALLWAYS RIGHT
I accept it as advice within their context. If you don't understand them, dig in a little more to better understand where they are coming form. Your grandparents won't be here forever, and their love and wisdom/perspective will be preserved in large part through you.
sometimes, but one of my grandparents has been trying to convert me into a socialist, and i turn a deaf ear to that!
I am one of the older people.
depends on the situations. if its concerning about the decision i had to make, of course i will need their advice, seconds oipnions are better to hear right, therefor you don't have to worry you will take the wrong decisions. beside, usually elder has better visions (if they are well educated). but though advices come from the elders, it is our decision to make right ?
so i will folloe if its the best, why not, beside they are our family right, they will think the best for their grand daughter. (yet if you are not agree, you can turn it down), you have your own decision.
only my dad and husband
I take their advise because I don't want to learn from my mistakes, I rather learn from their mistakes!
Can't follow advice from my grandparents, they've all been dead for years.
As for other people, if the advice is good I follow it no matter who it comes from
On occasion they can shed light on a problem that people my own age would not see or even think of so yeah if it's good advice then I do.
if its a good advice
Always WELL MOST OF THE TIMEDo you follow the advice from older people?
If I feel its good advice.
only when im having trouble making my own decisions...which is rarely..
=)
I used to.
I am one of the older people ! You don't do like I do! You do like I tell you to do!
yea, as long as i think its half good ill follow it from almost anyone :)
Yes l do.
Yes, I usually do, because they have more life experience and generally know more about things than I do.
hell no! bleh! lol. i'd rather learn lessons from own mistakes.
Sometimes
SOMETIMES THEY ARNT ALLWAYS RIGHT
I accept it as advice within their context. If you don't understand them, dig in a little more to better understand where they are coming form. Your grandparents won't be here forever, and their love and wisdom/perspective will be preserved in large part through you.
sometimes, but one of my grandparents has been trying to convert me into a socialist, and i turn a deaf ear to that!
I am one of the older people.
depends on the situations. if its concerning about the decision i had to make, of course i will need their advice, seconds oipnions are better to hear right, therefor you don't have to worry you will take the wrong decisions. beside, usually elder has better visions (if they are well educated). but though advices come from the elders, it is our decision to make right ?
so i will folloe if its the best, why not, beside they are our family right, they will think the best for their grand daughter. (yet if you are not agree, you can turn it down), you have your own decision.
only my dad and husband
I take their advise because I don't want to learn from my mistakes, I rather learn from their mistakes!
Can't follow advice from my grandparents, they've all been dead for years.
As for other people, if the advice is good I follow it no matter who it comes from
On occasion they can shed light on a problem that people my own age would not see or even think of so yeah if it's good advice then I do.
if its a good advice
Why is it that when I ask for advice on here, people say I'm overreacting?
Because they are not intelligent enough to come up with a good answer, so they turn around and blame you for their shortcoming of not have a good answer to the question.Why is it that when I ask for advice on here, people say I'm overreacting?
take da complimentz ditch da rude remarkz ur not overreactin ur just worried like meWhy is it that when I ask for advice on here, people say I'm overreacting?
i guess people just dont like to be nice anymore.
Don't say that you know for me you're not over reactive because the purpose of asking is portrayed by your questions. So don't take it personally now ok. Remember God loves you and gave you the right to ask when you get lost....Ok LOVE YOU!!!!!
Because theyre assh*les. A lot of the time there will be a lot of people who read and don't answer, because it's hard to give advice over the internet. Or you could just be overreacting.. But I'd say its mostly the first reason :P
take da complimentz ditch da rude remarkz ur not overreactin ur just worried like meWhy is it that when I ask for advice on here, people say I'm overreacting?
i guess people just dont like to be nice anymore.
Don't say that you know for me you're not over reactive because the purpose of asking is portrayed by your questions. So don't take it personally now ok. Remember God loves you and gave you the right to ask when you get lost....Ok LOVE YOU!!!!!
Because theyre assh*les. A lot of the time there will be a lot of people who read and don't answer, because it's hard to give advice over the internet. Or you could just be overreacting.. But I'd say its mostly the first reason :P
Tension overload! Need your advice, P&S people!!!?
Neck starting to tighten up, not willing to breathe that much, squinting a lot, about to snap on someone. What's your remedy, P%26amp;S??
~PoppTension overload! Need your advice, P%26amp;S people!!!?
six pack
fishing pole
pondTension overload! Need your advice, P%26amp;S people!!!?
don't snap
PUNCH them instead
exercise
yoga
let out a scream (it does help)
~PoppTension overload! Need your advice, P%26amp;S people!!!?
six pack
fishing pole
pondTension overload! Need your advice, P%26amp;S people!!!?
don't snap
PUNCH them instead
exercise
yoga
let out a scream (it does help)
My girlfriend doesn't like me asking relationship advice from other people, what should I do?
She thinks that I am announcing to the whole world about her and I (together)'s privacy.My girlfriend doesn't like me asking relationship advice from other people, what should I do?
you're allowed to talk to your friends about her, but dont just ask people that you dont trust with your private info, and btw, dont tell her when you do unless she directly asks if you did, this is coming from a girl so trust me
good luckMy girlfriend doesn't like me asking relationship advice from other people, what should I do?
well you're doin' it right now.
i think you need to get some balls and think for yourself
Tell her she is a controlling b..itch
Ha ha! Good one.
Dont get caught.
hahha. well thats just great because youre doing that right now! anyway, just repect her privacy (and yours) because it is your business and hers together. If you want to ask anyone for advie, then you should talk to you brother or cousin or someone. Just no friends and do NOT come back on here again ; )
IF SHE DOESN'T WANT YOU TALKING TO ANYONE ELSE YOU SHOULD TALK TO HER. LET HER KNOW HOW YOU ARE FEELING AND YOU CAN WORK IT OUT TOGETHER. THAT IS WHAT A RELATIONSHIP IS ALL ABOUT.(COMMUNICATION) IF YOU CANT COMMUNICATE YOU HAVE NOTHING.
Well she's right but also tell her that if you want your relationship to suceed you need to know and learn more to satisfy all her needs.
Well thats what you just did. May be she doesnt like biased people. I ask questions about relationships and people never seem to understand. All they tell you to do is dump him/her. But you will never be with somebody if you dont accept thier flaws.
don't do it...that is true you are spreading your business around
Then don't tell her that you're getting answers from someone else.
i dont know
listen to her ********* I guess,you just did it again lol
try asking her
Guess your still doing it huh?
you're allowed to talk to your friends about her, but dont just ask people that you dont trust with your private info, and btw, dont tell her when you do unless she directly asks if you did, this is coming from a girl so trust me
good luckMy girlfriend doesn't like me asking relationship advice from other people, what should I do?
well you're doin' it right now.
i think you need to get some balls and think for yourself
Tell her she is a controlling b..itch
Ha ha! Good one.
Dont get caught.
hahha. well thats just great because youre doing that right now! anyway, just repect her privacy (and yours) because it is your business and hers together. If you want to ask anyone for advie, then you should talk to you brother or cousin or someone. Just no friends and do NOT come back on here again ; )
IF SHE DOESN'T WANT YOU TALKING TO ANYONE ELSE YOU SHOULD TALK TO HER. LET HER KNOW HOW YOU ARE FEELING AND YOU CAN WORK IT OUT TOGETHER. THAT IS WHAT A RELATIONSHIP IS ALL ABOUT.(COMMUNICATION) IF YOU CANT COMMUNICATE YOU HAVE NOTHING.
Well she's right but also tell her that if you want your relationship to suceed you need to know and learn more to satisfy all her needs.
Well thats what you just did. May be she doesnt like biased people. I ask questions about relationships and people never seem to understand. All they tell you to do is dump him/her. But you will never be with somebody if you dont accept thier flaws.
don't do it...that is true you are spreading your business around
Then don't tell her that you're getting answers from someone else.
i dont know
listen to her ********* I guess,you just did it again lol
try asking her
Guess your still doing it huh?
Why Do Some People Ask For Advice After They Cheated On Their Spouse/Partner?
Why do some people who cheated on their spouse/partner come here on Y/A and ask questions on how to improve on their relationship?
My opinion is, if you are susceptible to infidelity, you are not ready to get or be married. You took a vow and you broke that vow. You expect your spouse/partner to trust you again after what you've done? Go to marriage counseling. Don't rely on responses from Y/A because it's not good enough. I mean it's ok to have a crush on someone but acting upon that crush and getting involved with them, you are playing with fire.Why Do Some People Ask For Advice After They Cheated On Their Spouse/Partner?
Because they are searching for SOMEONE to justify their actions and tell them that they made the right choice in their circumstances.
I agree with you 110%. If they can not commit whole heartedly to someone and abide by the vows that they said to their hubby/wife, then they don't DESERVE to be married.Why Do Some People Ask For Advice After They Cheated On Their Spouse/Partner?
Guilt!
they are hoping someone will tell them that they didn't do anything wrong.
I agree
I believe that some people really are seeking advise...and are remorseful for what they have done.....I don't expect ANYONE to rely solely on YA for the right answers....but instead look at is at a starting place...to be pointed in the right direction. I honestly don't believe that most people get married with the intention of cheating on their spouse down the road......but it does happen.
Well, that is a good point but in truth people sometimes need many views on one situation to help their mind choose the best one for themselves. We are all still just people and even some of the best of therapists don't have the right advise for their own lives.For example I know a few of them and in truth their personal life track records are just as messed up as alot of the people they help to do the right thing.Why? cause we are all way better at helping others over our own self.Cause we are not personally connected to the feelings and results of that decision and therefore can make a better judgment not having that to work around them.
Opinions very among all of us, and sometimes the more of them you have, the better you are at making the one you need to.You take pieces of alot of them and make it into the decision that best. That's the great thing about being human, no one is perfect but if you listen as often as you speak, you just might learn alot from the world around you and make alot less of the same mistakes.
You forgot the part where they ask you ';not to judge them'; and report you for abuse when you tell them they have no integrity and aren't treating their partners with any respect, so they aren't compatible with them.
Oh, and then there are the ironic ones who send you personal email calling you all sorts of four letter words (before reporting you for abuse) claiming that you are a nasty person.
Same reason people call for help AFTER they get the car stuck in the mud. They don't realize they are in trouble till it's too late.
Well, it's to late to figure out you are not ready for marriage at that point. That would not explain the long term marriages that fall to this temptation after many years of marriage anyway. Yes, an affair is selfish and regardless of any real life problems within the marriage, there is no excuse. It's cruel to the spouse and any other person you drag into this mess. Work on problems and improving the marriage or get out before you look outside the marriage. Recognizing a 'crush' is a sign to work on yourself and protect yourself.
People can fall to temptations, make terrible selfish choices at any time in their life. People rationalize and justify their behavior to make themselves feel better about their actions. So often, all to late, they see the damage they created. They realize how much they DO want their marriage and spouse.
So, faced with the consequences of their terrible choices, they are in a crisis. How can they fix what they broke all for an ego boost? I guess they will ask anywhere. If this is a place they are familiar with, then they ask here. I've noticed that the majority of responses on this site are to end the marriage, not in support of working to save it. To many people seem to consider marriage disposable. Yes, infidelity is a terrible emotional trauma, but like many things in our lives that are horrible choices, we can work to rebuild if we want to. Someone who really regrets their choice CAN work to change, can build stronger boundaries to protect themselves and their marriage if they choose.
The internet is full of great sites with help for couples going through this crisis for free and some great forum sites with lots of helpful people who have been through this and are in recovery, with or without their spouse. Many marriages survive an affair, but it takes lots of work and commitment from both spouses. There are also sites out there just to make money off of people in pain.
Need help? There are a few great books also available.
Just a few:
';Not Just Friends'; by S. Glass
';After the Affair'; by Springs
';Surviving an Affair'; by Dr. W. Harley.
My opinion is, if you are susceptible to infidelity, you are not ready to get or be married. You took a vow and you broke that vow. You expect your spouse/partner to trust you again after what you've done? Go to marriage counseling. Don't rely on responses from Y/A because it's not good enough. I mean it's ok to have a crush on someone but acting upon that crush and getting involved with them, you are playing with fire.Why Do Some People Ask For Advice After They Cheated On Their Spouse/Partner?
Because they are searching for SOMEONE to justify their actions and tell them that they made the right choice in their circumstances.
I agree with you 110%. If they can not commit whole heartedly to someone and abide by the vows that they said to their hubby/wife, then they don't DESERVE to be married.Why Do Some People Ask For Advice After They Cheated On Their Spouse/Partner?
Guilt!
they are hoping someone will tell them that they didn't do anything wrong.
I agree
I believe that some people really are seeking advise...and are remorseful for what they have done.....I don't expect ANYONE to rely solely on YA for the right answers....but instead look at is at a starting place...to be pointed in the right direction. I honestly don't believe that most people get married with the intention of cheating on their spouse down the road......but it does happen.
Well, that is a good point but in truth people sometimes need many views on one situation to help their mind choose the best one for themselves. We are all still just people and even some of the best of therapists don't have the right advise for their own lives.For example I know a few of them and in truth their personal life track records are just as messed up as alot of the people they help to do the right thing.Why? cause we are all way better at helping others over our own self.Cause we are not personally connected to the feelings and results of that decision and therefore can make a better judgment not having that to work around them.
Opinions very among all of us, and sometimes the more of them you have, the better you are at making the one you need to.You take pieces of alot of them and make it into the decision that best. That's the great thing about being human, no one is perfect but if you listen as often as you speak, you just might learn alot from the world around you and make alot less of the same mistakes.
You forgot the part where they ask you ';not to judge them'; and report you for abuse when you tell them they have no integrity and aren't treating their partners with any respect, so they aren't compatible with them.
Oh, and then there are the ironic ones who send you personal email calling you all sorts of four letter words (before reporting you for abuse) claiming that you are a nasty person.
Same reason people call for help AFTER they get the car stuck in the mud. They don't realize they are in trouble till it's too late.
Well, it's to late to figure out you are not ready for marriage at that point. That would not explain the long term marriages that fall to this temptation after many years of marriage anyway. Yes, an affair is selfish and regardless of any real life problems within the marriage, there is no excuse. It's cruel to the spouse and any other person you drag into this mess. Work on problems and improving the marriage or get out before you look outside the marriage. Recognizing a 'crush' is a sign to work on yourself and protect yourself.
People can fall to temptations, make terrible selfish choices at any time in their life. People rationalize and justify their behavior to make themselves feel better about their actions. So often, all to late, they see the damage they created. They realize how much they DO want their marriage and spouse.
So, faced with the consequences of their terrible choices, they are in a crisis. How can they fix what they broke all for an ego boost? I guess they will ask anywhere. If this is a place they are familiar with, then they ask here. I've noticed that the majority of responses on this site are to end the marriage, not in support of working to save it. To many people seem to consider marriage disposable. Yes, infidelity is a terrible emotional trauma, but like many things in our lives that are horrible choices, we can work to rebuild if we want to. Someone who really regrets their choice CAN work to change, can build stronger boundaries to protect themselves and their marriage if they choose.
The internet is full of great sites with help for couples going through this crisis for free and some great forum sites with lots of helpful people who have been through this and are in recovery, with or without their spouse. Many marriages survive an affair, but it takes lots of work and commitment from both spouses. There are also sites out there just to make money off of people in pain.
Need help? There are a few great books also available.
Just a few:
';Not Just Friends'; by S. Glass
';After the Affair'; by Springs
';Surviving an Affair'; by Dr. W. Harley.
New school, new people Any Advice?
Hey.Im 17 next yr is my LAST year in High school..
My family is moving to another city so ill have to change schools. I dont know anybody there so im a bit scared...
Id love to hear any advice thnxNew school, new people Any Advice?
That's tough but I am sure you will be fine. It is good to be friendly, confidant and cheerful but not to be pushy or a no-all. Yes, do join clubs and if you play sports, that will help too. I hope there are plenty of teenagers is your new neighbourhood so you have an opportunity to get to know them. Good luck. New school, new people Any Advice?
Join some sports club or other clubs.
Look people in the eyes , smile %26amp; say ';Hi';.
Best of luck to you.pink blush
My family is moving to another city so ill have to change schools. I dont know anybody there so im a bit scared...
Id love to hear any advice thnxNew school, new people Any Advice?
That's tough but I am sure you will be fine. It is good to be friendly, confidant and cheerful but not to be pushy or a no-all. Yes, do join clubs and if you play sports, that will help too. I hope there are plenty of teenagers is your new neighbourhood so you have an opportunity to get to know them. Good luck. New school, new people Any Advice?
Join some sports club or other clubs.
Look people in the eyes , smile %26amp; say ';Hi';.
Best of luck to you.
I have a problem with my marriage that my husband doesnt know about, I need some advice from people?
Well i just got married June 18th 2009, there is one problem that i have about our marriage and i knew it might be a problem when we got married. My husband lives in the United Kingdom and I live in the United States, he's in the Royal Navy and well i am waiting to get my visa so i can live and work in the UK. The problem is I am not happy. I don't work or go to school here. The reason i don't work or go to school is because my husband said that i was going to go to the UK in Aug 1 to see him for 3 weeks. Well he said to me that he is taking care of my flight but he hasn't gotten it. He told me that he is going to get it when he gets paid the 31st of july which is dumb because the flight would cost twice. Then he says he has people that owe him money so he will call them. So since last week we have emailed each other and not once has he said anything about me going over there. I am worried that he will end up saying no to me. Well honestly i cant have a marriage like this. I thought i was going to be ok with this but i am not. I don't like things being un decided and i don't like last minute things. I also don't like not doing anything. I am use to working or going to school but not just hanging out at home and doing nothing. He emails me and tells me he went to the movies did this did that. It annoys me honestly. I dont even feel like emailing him back. He emails twice a day sometimes 3 and sometimes i want to write him a nasty letter just because he annoys me. Am i in the wrong with all this? How can i explain to him my feelings without hurting him ? I love my husband i just hate this situation. I just need advice thanks everyoneI have a problem with my marriage that my husband doesnt know about, I need some advice from people?
That is bad, sounds bad and im sorry your not enjoying your marriage the way it should be enjoyed, first of all, stop acting like a dumb girl just stand up and tell him, you know what, im going to skewl and im getting a job, i can't just stand here for nothing to happen. you shouldn't have gotten married unless everything was being taken care of, he might even have someone over there and thats the reason he wants you here.I have a problem with my marriage that my husband doesnt know about, I need some advice from people?
I would sit down and write him and tell him exactly how I feel. For goodness sakes he's your husband and if he loves and respects you no matter what he will respect your feelings.
if i were you i would just tell him. if he loves you he will make things work and try to make you happy.
If you love your husband then you need to be patient and have faith in him.You can't just be that childish that things like going to the movies etc can tease you and piss you off and makes you even want to send him nasty mails just to piss him off, because i would say that's pretty childish act that shouldn't come from a grown up,don't you think?!
So, just how well did you know him before you met him? It's just that he's not being particularly empathetic or reliable.. And, if you're so used to working, why can't you/couldn't you have bought your own ticket over to the UK?
How long have you guys been together for before you were married? It doesn't sound like you know each other very well! He should know that you being apart upsets you, and you should also feel secure enough to tell him how you are feeling about all of this. For him to be living in the UK and you to be in the US is a joke, that is not a marriage. I suggest you give him an ultamatiom...either he gets you there ASAP or you are leaving him. Long distance relationships don't work for the best of us. You need to speak up, tell him how you truely feel and get over there soon as before you get too lonely, and bored!
I don't understand how people would marry and then not be with the person they married? I would suggest that he cough up the money to get you there or you divorce. No sense in waiting around. Do what youw ant to do. Don't stop your aspirations and goals just because you married a guy in the UK.
That is bad, sounds bad and im sorry your not enjoying your marriage the way it should be enjoyed, first of all, stop acting like a dumb girl just stand up and tell him, you know what, im going to skewl and im getting a job, i can't just stand here for nothing to happen. you shouldn't have gotten married unless everything was being taken care of, he might even have someone over there and thats the reason he wants you here.I have a problem with my marriage that my husband doesnt know about, I need some advice from people?
I would sit down and write him and tell him exactly how I feel. For goodness sakes he's your husband and if he loves and respects you no matter what he will respect your feelings.
if i were you i would just tell him. if he loves you he will make things work and try to make you happy.
If you love your husband then you need to be patient and have faith in him.You can't just be that childish that things like going to the movies etc can tease you and piss you off and makes you even want to send him nasty mails just to piss him off, because i would say that's pretty childish act that shouldn't come from a grown up,don't you think?!
So, just how well did you know him before you met him? It's just that he's not being particularly empathetic or reliable.. And, if you're so used to working, why can't you/couldn't you have bought your own ticket over to the UK?
How long have you guys been together for before you were married? It doesn't sound like you know each other very well! He should know that you being apart upsets you, and you should also feel secure enough to tell him how you are feeling about all of this. For him to be living in the UK and you to be in the US is a joke, that is not a marriage. I suggest you give him an ultamatiom...either he gets you there ASAP or you are leaving him. Long distance relationships don't work for the best of us. You need to speak up, tell him how you truely feel and get over there soon as before you get too lonely, and bored!
I don't understand how people would marry and then not be with the person they married? I would suggest that he cough up the money to get you there or you divorce. No sense in waiting around. Do what youw ant to do. Don't stop your aspirations and goals just because you married a guy in the UK.
People living in Bangkok, I need advice?
I will be here in Bangkok for 2 years, I dont work and I am looking for things to do that will help me in the future. I am currently taking chinese but that's only twice a week. I want to keep me busy, like sewing classes, cooking classes (not the ones from hotel, those are so expensive) or something else.
I have been looking for things online but so far I have found information for tourism only. Please advise me.People living in Bangkok, I need advice?
Look like you want to learn something that most women and housewives want to do, cooking, flower decoration, fruit handicraft, etc.
It won't be expensive if you apply these courses at the public college, such as Suan Dusit Teacher college (understand that it's now part of Rachaphat University). Its location is close to Anantasamkom Thorn Hall, close to St. Gabriel College. it's between the two bridges across Chao Phya River (Rama 8 and Thonburi or San Hi bridge). You can check the map.
The charge will be reasonable and you won't have problem with language or communication. Besides, there're tons of interesting courses to make you busy during your stay.
There're so many interesting courses you can attend at public colleges and universities, it's not expensive. Silapacheep Center in Ayudhya is one of them but it's 60 km from Bkk and might not be convenient for you. The center initiated by HM the Queen and now under the Queen's patronage has established so that Thai ladies have chance to learn and practices thai traditional handicrafts, sewing, etc. You can visit the center when you are in Thailand. It might attract your interests. Good luck and welcome to Thailand.People living in Bangkok, I need advice?
Yes...... The course offers a unique location in this relatively tourist free part of Thailand. So, what could be better! Meeting your Thai lady in our special part of Thailand and enjoying the tranquil surrounds of Ubolrat. Combine that with a leisurely round of golf!! We extend to you an invitation to experience the Kingdom of Thailand but also to see what a treasure trove of culture abounds within this special area!
I don't live in Bangkok but have traveled to Thailand and Bangkok for business and tourism more than once a year. My last trip was in Dec 06 and will be going again later this month.
My advice is first to learn to speak Thai. Unless you want to move only within the English speaking expatriate community.
goto www.progress-education.com or call 027113311 *1,2
They'v got thaicooking class for 22 menu for 3500 B.
I am assuming you are female and if that is the case you may want to join one of the many expat women's groups in Bangkok, they are based on nationality for example there is a British Woman's Group, an American one an Australian and New Zealand one, a German and so on.
If you don't want to do this there are many church based groups, failing this why not donate some of your time to charity work with underprivilaged children, people with HIV/AIDS or even a dog rescue charity.
Go learn Thai cooking.....they got the best cuisine in the world I think.....and try learning Thai instead of Chinese, you pick it up faster there.
get a boy friend.
Just curious, how do you expect to live in BKK, if you don't work. Also, what type of visa are you applying to get. A visa is required for any stays over 30 days.
I have been looking for things online but so far I have found information for tourism only. Please advise me.People living in Bangkok, I need advice?
Look like you want to learn something that most women and housewives want to do, cooking, flower decoration, fruit handicraft, etc.
It won't be expensive if you apply these courses at the public college, such as Suan Dusit Teacher college (understand that it's now part of Rachaphat University). Its location is close to Anantasamkom Thorn Hall, close to St. Gabriel College. it's between the two bridges across Chao Phya River (Rama 8 and Thonburi or San Hi bridge). You can check the map.
The charge will be reasonable and you won't have problem with language or communication. Besides, there're tons of interesting courses to make you busy during your stay.
There're so many interesting courses you can attend at public colleges and universities, it's not expensive. Silapacheep Center in Ayudhya is one of them but it's 60 km from Bkk and might not be convenient for you. The center initiated by HM the Queen and now under the Queen's patronage has established so that Thai ladies have chance to learn and practices thai traditional handicrafts, sewing, etc. You can visit the center when you are in Thailand. It might attract your interests. Good luck and welcome to Thailand.People living in Bangkok, I need advice?
Yes...... The course offers a unique location in this relatively tourist free part of Thailand. So, what could be better! Meeting your Thai lady in our special part of Thailand and enjoying the tranquil surrounds of Ubolrat. Combine that with a leisurely round of golf!! We extend to you an invitation to experience the Kingdom of Thailand but also to see what a treasure trove of culture abounds within this special area!
I don't live in Bangkok but have traveled to Thailand and Bangkok for business and tourism more than once a year. My last trip was in Dec 06 and will be going again later this month.
My advice is first to learn to speak Thai. Unless you want to move only within the English speaking expatriate community.
goto www.progress-education.com or call 027113311 *1,2
They'v got thaicooking class for 22 menu for 3500 B.
I am assuming you are female and if that is the case you may want to join one of the many expat women's groups in Bangkok, they are based on nationality for example there is a British Woman's Group, an American one an Australian and New Zealand one, a German and so on.
If you don't want to do this there are many church based groups, failing this why not donate some of your time to charity work with underprivilaged children, people with HIV/AIDS or even a dog rescue charity.
Go learn Thai cooking.....they got the best cuisine in the world I think.....and try learning Thai instead of Chinese, you pick it up faster there.
get a boy friend.
Just curious, how do you expect to live in BKK, if you don't work. Also, what type of visa are you applying to get. A visa is required for any stays over 30 days.
Poll:- Do people need Advice on Borrowing Money?
Always borrow from a Pessimist
They Dont Expect it back.Lol.Poll:- Do people need Advice on Borrowing Money?
I believe some people need help with everything in their lives. lolPoll:- Do people need Advice on Borrowing Money?
Thank you for B/A, and you are very sexy to me darling. xxxxxxxxx
Why would I need advice about or borrowing money?
I will keep that in mind
They Dont Expect it back.Lol.Poll:- Do people need Advice on Borrowing Money?
I believe some people need help with everything in their lives. lolPoll:- Do people need Advice on Borrowing Money?
Thank you for B/A, and you are very sexy to me darling. xxxxxxxxx
Report Abuse
Why would I need advice about or borrowing money?
I will keep that in mind
Why do people who ask God for wisdom also ask other people for advice? Wouldn't God always give better advice?
Thank you Squirrel, you just helped me more than you will ever know.
Anyone else want to invest in the Catholic Church with me?Why do people who ask God for wisdom also ask other people for advice? Wouldn't God always give better advice?
Because God gave people brains to help discern things...Right now I am seeking advice from people on something, but I am also praying religiously (no pun intended) and reading the Bible. As people sometimes we ';hear'; what we want to from God and not actually what he is trying to tell us..so it is important for us to have people who give wise counsel..I prefer for certain things to speak to fellow Christians and ask for prayer...God does give the best advice- sometimes he answers through others.Why do people who ask God for wisdom also ask other people for advice? Wouldn't God always give better advice?
You asked an awesome awesome awesome question! And I actually understand what you're asking. Truthfully, God always gives better advice, that's why the first one we should all resort to for advice on the things we do is Jesus. But- there is also nothing wrong with seeking good solid Christian counsel because the Lord may use another person to encourage you with the Word...or they may even give you advice in the word you might not yet know. The Lord will speak to those who are willing to listen. But how can you hear his voice if you don't know his word? So, for some....He may use other people to speak good counsel to another person to help them out with whatever they need advice with. Or else.....couldn't you have asked HIm this question yourself?......:)
maybe god said go ask the lawyer
:)
God uses others to help us. Often He uses professionals.
He expects us to use the brains He gave to us.
God helps those who help themselves.
God works through vessels here on Earth. I believe in healing too, but I go to the Doctor...Only God can heal but the Doctor is his instrument of healing....all Doctors know this...they cannot heal..Same with lawyers....the lawyer supplies the work...God decides the outcome..
That is called getting a second opinion....
Because God does not talk to you! You dont get any answers directly from him.
God does not give advice.
or why ask a doctor what treatment to follow
wisdom can be sent with spirit if He wishes to give it to the asker..
How many people can get direct, audio-visual help from God? You might get something you think might be from God, but it might also be a demon tempting you to do the wrong thing. How many times have you read about some nut who kills a bunch of people, maybe even his own family, and says God told him to? Do you think that was God who told him to? Either his own twisted mind or a demon, I should think.
It's true that God can answer you through other people, and sometime and answer you by presenting something to you. The reason you don't hear him directly, because you haven't line yourself properly with him. Give all of yourself to him and he will respond. Learn to listen and he will provide you with the information you that you seek.
because god puts you on hold
Well, it's true that God always gives better advice, but God can always answer in person... So, I'd say the people talking to the lawyer at least have SOME sense...
God can and does answer prayer through people sometimes.
When I was 13 I prayed to God to give me wisdom. The next day, I became an atheist.
Pray away the gay!
Lol, this is similar to asking why Christians need health insurance, they shouldn't right? Ask and ye shall recieve? Oh yeah, it isn't like that at all, God has NO power at all.
Um, the only reason people ask OTHER people for advice is because they talk back right away. Sometimes it takes time for God to ';speak to your heart'; .... i guess.
Anyone else want to invest in the Catholic Church with me?Why do people who ask God for wisdom also ask other people for advice? Wouldn't God always give better advice?
Because God gave people brains to help discern things...Right now I am seeking advice from people on something, but I am also praying religiously (no pun intended) and reading the Bible. As people sometimes we ';hear'; what we want to from God and not actually what he is trying to tell us..so it is important for us to have people who give wise counsel..I prefer for certain things to speak to fellow Christians and ask for prayer...God does give the best advice- sometimes he answers through others.Why do people who ask God for wisdom also ask other people for advice? Wouldn't God always give better advice?
You asked an awesome awesome awesome question! And I actually understand what you're asking. Truthfully, God always gives better advice, that's why the first one we should all resort to for advice on the things we do is Jesus. But- there is also nothing wrong with seeking good solid Christian counsel because the Lord may use another person to encourage you with the Word...or they may even give you advice in the word you might not yet know. The Lord will speak to those who are willing to listen. But how can you hear his voice if you don't know his word? So, for some....He may use other people to speak good counsel to another person to help them out with whatever they need advice with. Or else.....couldn't you have asked HIm this question yourself?......:)
maybe god said go ask the lawyer
:)
God uses others to help us. Often He uses professionals.
He expects us to use the brains He gave to us.
God helps those who help themselves.
God works through vessels here on Earth. I believe in healing too, but I go to the Doctor...Only God can heal but the Doctor is his instrument of healing....all Doctors know this...they cannot heal..Same with lawyers....the lawyer supplies the work...God decides the outcome..
That is called getting a second opinion....
Because God does not talk to you! You dont get any answers directly from him.
God does not give advice.
or why ask a doctor what treatment to follow
wisdom can be sent with spirit if He wishes to give it to the asker..
How many people can get direct, audio-visual help from God? You might get something you think might be from God, but it might also be a demon tempting you to do the wrong thing. How many times have you read about some nut who kills a bunch of people, maybe even his own family, and says God told him to? Do you think that was God who told him to? Either his own twisted mind or a demon, I should think.
It's true that God can answer you through other people, and sometime and answer you by presenting something to you. The reason you don't hear him directly, because you haven't line yourself properly with him. Give all of yourself to him and he will respond. Learn to listen and he will provide you with the information you that you seek.
because god puts you on hold
Well, it's true that God always gives better advice, but God can always answer in person... So, I'd say the people talking to the lawyer at least have SOME sense...
God can and does answer prayer through people sometimes.
When I was 13 I prayed to God to give me wisdom. The next day, I became an atheist.
Pray away the gay!
Lol, this is similar to asking why Christians need health insurance, they shouldn't right? Ask and ye shall recieve? Oh yeah, it isn't like that at all, God has NO power at all.
Um, the only reason people ask OTHER people for advice is because they talk back right away. Sometimes it takes time for God to ';speak to your heart'; .... i guess.
Please, I need as many people to give me advice on this as possible.Very important.No Joking please?
I own a small workshop. Last Monday, I had to leave early and only the workers were at the workshop. They are 2 workers ,and very honest. I trust them very much.
They sold things with the amount of 250 pounds on Monday. When the time came to close up, one of them put the money in the drawer of the desk , and they closed the doors and left.
The next morning, I came and asked for the money, it was gone. They looked for it every where , but they couldn't find it.There was no sign for any break in or anything.As I said , they didn't steal it. But what I think has happened is that they left the place for 3 or 4 minutes, which they often do, and someone got the money from the drawer.I decided to split the amount. I would pay 100. The one who had the money would pay 100. The other one would pay 50.But this last one refused . So I said o.k but I told him that if he ever leaves the place again, I would fire him. He got so upset and left. U think I was right or wrong ?wt should I have done ?Please, I need as many people to give me advice on this as possible.Very important.No Joking please?
this is a very difficult question, because, let's face it, enta keda 2ata3t 3esho! (u made him lose the only source of money he's got)
and coz of no real fault.. i mean, he shouldnt have refused to pay, but still, this is the punishment u give one who STOLE the money! not refused to pay damages!
i think a better solution would have been to force him to pay the money, i.e. cut it off his wage, and if he refuses, then HE should leave.. not that YOU fire him.. if that is what happened here, then i think u should give him a call or something in a couple of days to ask if he wants his job back, ON CONDITION he pays.. after all, he's trusted employee of urs..
i know ur not asking abt legal consequences but i'll mention it anyway.. im a law student and i vaguely remember something abt having to warn ur employee first before firing him for certain actions.. cant really remember what these were.. the point is, maybe what u have done is considered illegal.. however, it's not like he's going to sue u! but just so that u'll know for later on ya3ni..Please, I need as many people to give me advice on this as possible.Very important.No Joking please?
well, it seems that YOU didnt read my answer.coz after i said not fire him etc, i wrote ';if that is what happened here, then ...'; meaning that if in fact u didnt fire him%26amp;he left on his own, then ...
its just that u misunderstood me
%26amp;by the way, NO im not feeling guilty,%26amp;thx for the 10 points!!!
I think you did it right but my intuition says the one who offered to pay it all stole it................... and your best employee walked out.
Of course he could have just felt very guilty and offered to pay it all...
========================
In the U.S., it is illegal to make an employee pay for any or part of this mess.
Live and learn. Chalk this one up to experience and lock up your cash from now on!
I think the one who left probaly stole it and felt
guilty is why he walked out. If he had really done nothing wrong it would not bother him
you saying not to leave shop unattended. From
now on take the money everyday when you close up or have them bring it to you.
If the one who left doesn't return you have your thief.
okay i agree with you your shop should never be left unattended unless they were just right outside the door getting a cig dont make the older person pay the extra it ant fair and just make it clear that you dont want to make a big deal but your running a buisness and you have to be able to account for what goes in and out why didt you just take it outta there paychecks it would have been simpler but i guessing you were upset
1) If you asked them to reimburse you, then I think it should have been split evenly among them. 2) I think the kid who walked out should have considered himself LUCKY that you only wanted him to reimburse 1/3. 3) I think you should hire someone else to replace the kid who walked out.
tough situation.. I think you worked it out alright
You are the boss. As much as it pains you to see someone who is probably close to you since there are so few of you working together, you had to be the authority on the case.
I think that you handled it very well and diplomatically. By leaving the building empty and unlocked with essentially loose money, they may as well have stolen it since they left it open for someone else to do it.
No worries. I think you were right and fair.
you should have stayed there yourself, and if they left the business at all and didnt lock it they both were responsible for the money and i doubt you can legally make them pay but you can fire them both. its up to you however.
They sold things with the amount of 250 pounds on Monday. When the time came to close up, one of them put the money in the drawer of the desk , and they closed the doors and left.
The next morning, I came and asked for the money, it was gone. They looked for it every where , but they couldn't find it.There was no sign for any break in or anything.As I said , they didn't steal it. But what I think has happened is that they left the place for 3 or 4 minutes, which they often do, and someone got the money from the drawer.I decided to split the amount. I would pay 100. The one who had the money would pay 100. The other one would pay 50.But this last one refused . So I said o.k but I told him that if he ever leaves the place again, I would fire him. He got so upset and left. U think I was right or wrong ?wt should I have done ?Please, I need as many people to give me advice on this as possible.Very important.No Joking please?
this is a very difficult question, because, let's face it, enta keda 2ata3t 3esho! (u made him lose the only source of money he's got)
and coz of no real fault.. i mean, he shouldnt have refused to pay, but still, this is the punishment u give one who STOLE the money! not refused to pay damages!
i think a better solution would have been to force him to pay the money, i.e. cut it off his wage, and if he refuses, then HE should leave.. not that YOU fire him.. if that is what happened here, then i think u should give him a call or something in a couple of days to ask if he wants his job back, ON CONDITION he pays.. after all, he's trusted employee of urs..
i know ur not asking abt legal consequences but i'll mention it anyway.. im a law student and i vaguely remember something abt having to warn ur employee first before firing him for certain actions.. cant really remember what these were.. the point is, maybe what u have done is considered illegal.. however, it's not like he's going to sue u! but just so that u'll know for later on ya3ni..Please, I need as many people to give me advice on this as possible.Very important.No Joking please?
well, it seems that YOU didnt read my answer.coz after i said not fire him etc, i wrote ';if that is what happened here, then ...'; meaning that if in fact u didnt fire him%26amp;he left on his own, then ...
its just that u misunderstood me
%26amp;by the way, NO im not feeling guilty,%26amp;thx for the 10 points!!!
Report Abuse
I think you did it right but my intuition says the one who offered to pay it all stole it................... and your best employee walked out.
Of course he could have just felt very guilty and offered to pay it all...
========================
In the U.S., it is illegal to make an employee pay for any or part of this mess.
Live and learn. Chalk this one up to experience and lock up your cash from now on!
I think the one who left probaly stole it and felt
guilty is why he walked out. If he had really done nothing wrong it would not bother him
you saying not to leave shop unattended. From
now on take the money everyday when you close up or have them bring it to you.
If the one who left doesn't return you have your thief.
okay i agree with you your shop should never be left unattended unless they were just right outside the door getting a cig dont make the older person pay the extra it ant fair and just make it clear that you dont want to make a big deal but your running a buisness and you have to be able to account for what goes in and out why didt you just take it outta there paychecks it would have been simpler but i guessing you were upset
1) If you asked them to reimburse you, then I think it should have been split evenly among them. 2) I think the kid who walked out should have considered himself LUCKY that you only wanted him to reimburse 1/3. 3) I think you should hire someone else to replace the kid who walked out.
tough situation.. I think you worked it out alright
You are the boss. As much as it pains you to see someone who is probably close to you since there are so few of you working together, you had to be the authority on the case.
I think that you handled it very well and diplomatically. By leaving the building empty and unlocked with essentially loose money, they may as well have stolen it since they left it open for someone else to do it.
No worries. I think you were right and fair.
you should have stayed there yourself, and if they left the business at all and didnt lock it they both were responsible for the money and i doubt you can legally make them pay but you can fire them both. its up to you however.
Advice from Oboist (people who play oboe)?
Erm, well I was looking for a little support and advice from any oboist. I was wondering if I could have some tips on how to play softer ;) and suggestions for songs to play (I've been playing for 5 months, very beginner). Thanks for any advice!Advice from Oboist (people who play oboe)?
Playing quietly takes a lot of practice! The most important thing is NOT to use less air. You actually need more air support but you have to close down on the embrochure without biting the reed. Try some long tone exercises- take a deep breath, play a single note and hold it out for 16 counts. Start out quietly (purse your lips around the reed with a little more pressure but keep the air support from your abdominal muscles). Gradually go louder for 8 counts then down again to as quiet as you can go for 8 counts (still keeping the air support). Do this every day for a few minutes and it will improve!
For solos try a beginner solo/contest book from your local music store. Or if you have a Barret or the Rubank beginner book there are etudes and other nice pieces in there.pink blush
Playing quietly takes a lot of practice! The most important thing is NOT to use less air. You actually need more air support but you have to close down on the embrochure without biting the reed. Try some long tone exercises- take a deep breath, play a single note and hold it out for 16 counts. Start out quietly (purse your lips around the reed with a little more pressure but keep the air support from your abdominal muscles). Gradually go louder for 8 counts then down again to as quiet as you can go for 8 counts (still keeping the air support). Do this every day for a few minutes and it will improve!
For solos try a beginner solo/contest book from your local music store. Or if you have a Barret or the Rubank beginner book there are etudes and other nice pieces in there.
Don't you hate when fat people give you advice on diet and exercise?
Don't you hate when fat people are aloud to live on the same planet as you? I sure do.Don't you hate when fat people give you advice on diet and exercise?
LMAO!!!
I hate that.....i am blessed to be naturally thin,and i hate it when people try to gove me advice on exercising...especially when they look like they really need to take their own advice!!!Don't you hate when fat people give you advice on diet and exercise?
Hahaha yes. I just have to look at them and shake my head. Or say something like ';Oh is that what you do? Good. I'll do the exact opposite.';
Finally! Someone who understands me!
Yes, more than anything! My dad always does,
and he always eats ice cream or something super
fattening randomly at like 1 in the morning! and my
fitness instructor is overweight, too! weird, huh?
*holds grease dripping burger* NOM NOM NOM! Make sure you workout at least 30 minutes each day!
*guzzles down shake* GULP GULP GULP! Eat lots of fruits and veggies!!
haha
hehe yeah...
I love it when fatties go to McDonald's, order a million cheeseburgers then get a diet Coke to wash them down. It makes me laugh.
Lol.
I went for a check-up once and the doctor was telling me i was overweight and blah blah blah
And you know what the funny part was? The doctor was like 200lbs herself!
Ha.!
No. Usually us fatties have tried everything out there so we know what we're talking about. It just hasn't worked for us.
lol I don't need exercise/diet advice from people
Look around, most are overweight..
Hm,
that wouldnt be ';Advice';
now would it?
i dont think so.
Yeah, I had a doctor like that once. --------------------
';fat people'; ? what, is that like a new sterotype?
thats ****** up.
no...
cause they are giving the advice for my own good...
no. It means that they are trying to get better. Don't be such a *****
no... why, do you? lol
they're just telling you the opposite of what they do!
d:
how can you tell if their fat? jsut by the way they type,
uh i dont think they do thattt...at least no fat person i know does
Randy Jackson told me I have love handles... WHICH I DONT
wow thats never happened to me. usually im the one tellin them that lol
'course! LOL. they're the one in need of exercise. haha. x)
They don't give me advice, I'm the one who gives them advice.
theyre just trying to make up for thier own imperfections
yea so i just say. ';yea u do that';
LMAO!!!
I hate that.....i am blessed to be naturally thin,and i hate it when people try to gove me advice on exercising...especially when they look like they really need to take their own advice!!!Don't you hate when fat people give you advice on diet and exercise?
Hahaha yes. I just have to look at them and shake my head. Or say something like ';Oh is that what you do? Good. I'll do the exact opposite.';
Finally! Someone who understands me!
Yes, more than anything! My dad always does,
and he always eats ice cream or something super
fattening randomly at like 1 in the morning! and my
fitness instructor is overweight, too! weird, huh?
*holds grease dripping burger* NOM NOM NOM! Make sure you workout at least 30 minutes each day!
*guzzles down shake* GULP GULP GULP! Eat lots of fruits and veggies!!
haha
hehe yeah...
I love it when fatties go to McDonald's, order a million cheeseburgers then get a diet Coke to wash them down. It makes me laugh.
Lol.
I went for a check-up once and the doctor was telling me i was overweight and blah blah blah
And you know what the funny part was? The doctor was like 200lbs herself!
Ha.!
No. Usually us fatties have tried everything out there so we know what we're talking about. It just hasn't worked for us.
lol I don't need exercise/diet advice from people
Look around, most are overweight..
Hm,
that wouldnt be ';Advice';
now would it?
i dont think so.
Yeah, I had a doctor like that once. --------------------
';fat people'; ? what, is that like a new sterotype?
thats ****** up.
no...
cause they are giving the advice for my own good...
no. It means that they are trying to get better. Don't be such a *****
no... why, do you? lol
they're just telling you the opposite of what they do!
d:
how can you tell if their fat? jsut by the way they type,
uh i dont think they do thattt...at least no fat person i know does
Randy Jackson told me I have love handles... WHICH I DONT
wow thats never happened to me. usually im the one tellin them that lol
'course! LOL. they're the one in need of exercise. haha. x)
They don't give me advice, I'm the one who gives them advice.
theyre just trying to make up for thier own imperfections
yea so i just say. ';yea u do that';
I need advice: at my work we are doing Bad Santa or some people call it Dirty Santa?
we have only 5 people working men and women what would be something unique for a gift the limit is $10.00? i thought about a piggy bank with a 10.00 bill in it?? Please any help or other suggestions would be Great!!I need advice: at my work we are doing Bad Santa or some people call it Dirty Santa?
That was a good idea (for your gift). Ages ago during a family party, someone picked a present (given by my dad)--he wrapped a $100 bill around a fleet enema (bottle). But of course, the bottle was still in the paper box (as it was bought from the store). At first the person was upset, thinking that it was, well, an enema that he (or she?) wasn't going to use, and no matter what, it was only worth $2 or so at that time. Dad said, open the box--and he did--and we all laughed about it. (Many wished they had picked it instead.)
I need advice: at my work we are doing Bad Santa or some people call it Dirty Santa?
how about a piggy bank with a couple of lottery tickets in it instead?
or if you have a specialty you are good at baking you could make that and include a nice mug and a packet of cocoa?
merry christmas!
edit: i wouldn't do anything smutty - but thats just me - sorry
Never heard of a Bad -or dirty-Santa, but I don't think it means a cool gift like what you had in mind. Maybe something like a box of erotic shaped macaroni? or some edible underwear? or how about the dvd of the movie Bad Santa??
a gift card
That was a good idea (for your gift). Ages ago during a family party, someone picked a present (given by my dad)--he wrapped a $100 bill around a fleet enema (bottle). But of course, the bottle was still in the paper box (as it was bought from the store). At first the person was upset, thinking that it was, well, an enema that he (or she?) wasn't going to use, and no matter what, it was only worth $2 or so at that time. Dad said, open the box--and he did--and we all laughed about it. (Many wished they had picked it instead.)
I need advice: at my work we are doing Bad Santa or some people call it Dirty Santa?
how about a piggy bank with a couple of lottery tickets in it instead?
or if you have a specialty you are good at baking you could make that and include a nice mug and a packet of cocoa?
merry christmas!
edit: i wouldn't do anything smutty - but thats just me - sorry
Never heard of a Bad -or dirty-Santa, but I don't think it means a cool gift like what you had in mind. Maybe something like a box of erotic shaped macaroni? or some edible underwear? or how about the dvd of the movie Bad Santa??
a gift card
Does he like me?? Please people with good advice.?
My friend and i hang out a lot and we sent text messages about how we like eachother then he has acts like we never sent those messages. Wtf is going on??? does he like me or whatDoes he like me?? Please people with good advice.?
He probably still liked you but is just shy about it i went out with a guy like that and in my experience it didnt work out when we went out completly ignored me not trying to get you down just trying to sve you the heartache but you never know he could be different :) good luck!!!Does he like me?? Please people with good advice.?
I think he likes you but isn't ready to show it in person. a lot of people are more confindent through text or online
Do you like him?
If not then dont bother with thinking does he like you.
If you like him, then ask him what did he mean by those messages, if he doesn't admit he sent them, and acts all weird and distant, then he probably doesn't like you, if he does answer, then you will find out.
He might be shy or insecure you should confont him about it alone.
he may but may not want to show it publicly
or its his way of flirting more
A lot of people hide behind something, whether it's a screen/phone/whatever. just confront him about whether he actually likes you or not.
Its hard to tell with texts because he could be just playing around or trying to play it cool around his friends. Boys are confusing that way
im pretty sure he does
but doesnt want any body to know he likes you
this hapened 2 me!!!!!!! i was talking 2 a guy on IM and we told each other we like one another and the next day it was awkward and i pretended to not c him every were he was. then i found out he likes more then one girl. so ur situation is similar 2 mine and he might like more then one girl..... but i dont think thats realy true.. i think hes just nervouse and thinks its awkward.
i can hinestly tell u from person experiences that boys will act nice to u wen its jus u 2 then wen ppl come around dey dis u and dat jus means their not the right one 4 u they are not really likin u if u 2 cant display publicly that ur together or that he like u etc. good luck girl
No.
He does not.
i would usually say yes but since he is being such a jerk, if he cant admitt it then he doesnt like you i dont think... sorry :(
He probably still liked you but is just shy about it i went out with a guy like that and in my experience it didnt work out when we went out completly ignored me not trying to get you down just trying to sve you the heartache but you never know he could be different :) good luck!!!Does he like me?? Please people with good advice.?
I think he likes you but isn't ready to show it in person. a lot of people are more confindent through text or online
Do you like him?
If not then dont bother with thinking does he like you.
If you like him, then ask him what did he mean by those messages, if he doesn't admit he sent them, and acts all weird and distant, then he probably doesn't like you, if he does answer, then you will find out.
He might be shy or insecure you should confont him about it alone.
he may but may not want to show it publicly
or its his way of flirting more
A lot of people hide behind something, whether it's a screen/phone/whatever. just confront him about whether he actually likes you or not.
Its hard to tell with texts because he could be just playing around or trying to play it cool around his friends. Boys are confusing that way
im pretty sure he does
but doesnt want any body to know he likes you
this hapened 2 me!!!!!!! i was talking 2 a guy on IM and we told each other we like one another and the next day it was awkward and i pretended to not c him every were he was. then i found out he likes more then one girl. so ur situation is similar 2 mine and he might like more then one girl..... but i dont think thats realy true.. i think hes just nervouse and thinks its awkward.
i can hinestly tell u from person experiences that boys will act nice to u wen its jus u 2 then wen ppl come around dey dis u and dat jus means their not the right one 4 u they are not really likin u if u 2 cant display publicly that ur together or that he like u etc. good luck girl
No.
He does not.
i would usually say yes but since he is being such a jerk, if he cant admitt it then he doesnt like you i dont think... sorry :(
Can anyone give me advice on the best procedures when contacting people through a dating site?
I've been contacted by loads of people, but either never write back because I don't know what to write or say something stupid in a reply so they don't. Twice I've given my email address to someone and we've talked for a bit then suddenly stopped. All I want to know is are there certain ways of doing this? Does anyone have any suggestions on what things I could say when leaving a message so I won't sound stupid and ruin what must have made them interested in the first place and what happens after that? How do I keep it going? Do we just exchange emails? Do we chat on messenger and when is it okay to meet up? Any advice on this would be appreciated, especially examples or stories about when you used one of these sites and what you did. Thx.Can anyone give me advice on the best procedures when contacting people through a dating site?
When sumone gives you an answer that works... IMS MECan anyone give me advice on the best procedures when contacting people through a dating site?
They will only come away from their computer if they feel confortable with you. Be honest and not act desperate. Happy active employed men is what a woman wants.
i met my fiancee on a dating site so it does work but from my experience it is just a numbers game. you have to send out 20 messages to get one reply. so what i did is compose a good letter on a word processor then copy and paste it to all the women i had saved as favourites. the difference in response was amazing. just see it from the woman's point of view, they want someone who sounds interesting and willing to be open about what they want. All this hi how are you today is a waste of time. you have got to be willing to put in the hours and try to get to the point where you speak on the phone asap.
Heya-
I met my husband to-be through a dating site so it does actually work! he had been on the internet longer than me and he said that a lot of women did that. I think perhaps there are a lot of women on dating sites that are on for a bit of 'fun flirting' or some that have been hurt and very fragile, they can be scared off very easily.
When i started talking to my man..he was really calm and cool...at first he said 'hello, my name is Andrew, how are you.' That was good because it was light and friendly and the how are you opened it up for a reply....the secret is keep each message quite short, but put something in it that will provoke a reply and keep them interested..Long messages i always thought seemed desperate. Don't give too much away too soon....
good luck...it worked for me!
I'd use eHarmony.com, because those people aren't there to fart around %26amp; play games, they're there to find someone. eHarmony is pricey, so people looking merely for a date on Saturday night would most likely not use eHarmony. Those who seek are willing to pay because they're serious about finding someone.
It really depends how serious both parties are. there are far too many people out there just messing around and leading people on...both male and female. From my experience it all came down to a little luck and a little trust. I replied to a lady who contacted me, it turned out she'd done some pretty agressive sifting of potential dates before contacting me, I just tried to be myself...not too over the top. I let her dictate the pace of the e-mails and only suggested a meeting after best part of a month. I insisted that she choose the when and where so she was in control of thge situation but it went really well. We met three years ago and celebrated our first wedding anniversary earlier this month !
When sumone gives you an answer that works... IMS MECan anyone give me advice on the best procedures when contacting people through a dating site?
They will only come away from their computer if they feel confortable with you. Be honest and not act desperate. Happy active employed men is what a woman wants.
i met my fiancee on a dating site so it does work but from my experience it is just a numbers game. you have to send out 20 messages to get one reply. so what i did is compose a good letter on a word processor then copy and paste it to all the women i had saved as favourites. the difference in response was amazing. just see it from the woman's point of view, they want someone who sounds interesting and willing to be open about what they want. All this hi how are you today is a waste of time. you have got to be willing to put in the hours and try to get to the point where you speak on the phone asap.
Heya-
I met my husband to-be through a dating site so it does actually work! he had been on the internet longer than me and he said that a lot of women did that. I think perhaps there are a lot of women on dating sites that are on for a bit of 'fun flirting' or some that have been hurt and very fragile, they can be scared off very easily.
When i started talking to my man..he was really calm and cool...at first he said 'hello, my name is Andrew, how are you.' That was good because it was light and friendly and the how are you opened it up for a reply....the secret is keep each message quite short, but put something in it that will provoke a reply and keep them interested..Long messages i always thought seemed desperate. Don't give too much away too soon....
good luck...it worked for me!
I'd use eHarmony.com, because those people aren't there to fart around %26amp; play games, they're there to find someone. eHarmony is pricey, so people looking merely for a date on Saturday night would most likely not use eHarmony. Those who seek are willing to pay because they're serious about finding someone.
It really depends how serious both parties are. there are far too many people out there just messing around and leading people on...both male and female. From my experience it all came down to a little luck and a little trust. I replied to a lady who contacted me, it turned out she'd done some pretty agressive sifting of potential dates before contacting me, I just tried to be myself...not too over the top. I let her dictate the pace of the e-mails and only suggested a meeting after best part of a month. I insisted that she choose the when and where so she was in control of thge situation but it went really well. We met three years ago and celebrated our first wedding anniversary earlier this month !
All of u people i need ur help please !!! i need A gift advice?
a gr88888 friend of mine is moving to a diff state and i want to give her some gift through which she'll remember me ....i can buy it or u can tell me what i can make and how ?...please i need as many advices as possibleAll of u people i need ur help please !!! i need A gift advice?
Make a photo album with pictures of the two of you and your group of friends. Include little pieces of paper throughout the album where you write the memories of the good times you've had, funny memories, etc.All of u people i need ur help please !!! i need A gift advice?
I think you should find one of those large picture frames and make a collage with pictures of you two. The pictures should be from when you first met her up until the present. Include goofy ones, funny ones, and embarrassing ones. You want her to be able to remember you and all of your memories. You can also find some stickers with cute quotes to add to it.
I think with photo albums and scrapbooks, she can easily throw them to the side. With a big picture frame, she'll be excited to hang it up and it'll remain there for a loooooooong time.
I will be asuming that your friend is also a girl.
Hmm...here's my experience with gifts from girls to other girls.
If you have a nice bunch of photos of you and her (say around 20), make a scrap book of those photos. My suggestions:
1. Go to a photo developing shop and get all of these enlarged to a size where you can fit one photo on a page of A3 size, leaving a margin of 5-6 cm on each edge. %26lt;---probably cheaper.
Alternatively, if you have a good scanner, scan each photo, enlarge it, and print it on photo paper using photography ink. This will be expensive, but you can customize with additional graphics, text, etc.
2. The paper should be A3, preferably hand-made paper. Decorate each page with nice margins in glitter pens. After pasting the photos, Write a nice caption / details about the photo.
3. The cover to be made especially beautiful, having a great font saying something like ';Best Friends Forever'; or ';Treasured memories from me to u'; or anything else you want. Try writing each alphabet in a different font, looks nice sometimes.
5. Stick a nice handwritten letter on plain paper on the last page, telling her about you great times and how much you will miss her.
6. Last page can be decorated with the signs of all her other good friends.
Hope you get a good gift to give. BTW, handmade gifts are always better.
U R her best friend right? so u must be knowing her likes/dislikes.well if i was in ur position then would have gifted her a small statue of God (can be any GOD, depends upon one's religion) according to me that can be the best gift one can offer to someone we like,no matter who they are to us:)
U can make a photo frame and stick the pic of the best moment u and ur spent together and with it write a sweet letter about how much ur friendship means
For hand made crafts go to this site
http://www.hitentertainment.com/artattac鈥?/a>
u will get loads of sweet stuff there.
Gift her a wrist watch by saying no matter where ever you go.... our time wl always same n this watch wl remind you my presence.
or
gift a digital photo frame, by adding sm of ur most memorable snaps. so it wl run as screen saver n remind her about ur frindships all gd time
I agree with Jane. Make a scrapbook. It'll be something that she can look at whenever she feels sad or homesick and she'll remember all the good times the two of you had together.
I would give her a nice friendship ornament with a friendship poem or a nice quote, telling her how much she meaning to you all this time.
make a photo album of memories.
fill it with pictures of you and her and some of you guys other friends!
-Hope I Helped.
Make her a scrapbook of all the photos you have of you two!
Answer Mine?
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;鈥?/a>
I would organize a nice collage picture frame of you and your friend.
I was going to say the same thing as Jane
make a photo frame of ur group .
i think jane has said it all
give her her fav thing or a thing which u both have shared 4 yrs
Make a photo album with pictures of the two of you and your group of friends. Include little pieces of paper throughout the album where you write the memories of the good times you've had, funny memories, etc.All of u people i need ur help please !!! i need A gift advice?
I think you should find one of those large picture frames and make a collage with pictures of you two. The pictures should be from when you first met her up until the present. Include goofy ones, funny ones, and embarrassing ones. You want her to be able to remember you and all of your memories. You can also find some stickers with cute quotes to add to it.
I think with photo albums and scrapbooks, she can easily throw them to the side. With a big picture frame, she'll be excited to hang it up and it'll remain there for a loooooooong time.
I will be asuming that your friend is also a girl.
Hmm...here's my experience with gifts from girls to other girls.
If you have a nice bunch of photos of you and her (say around 20), make a scrap book of those photos. My suggestions:
1. Go to a photo developing shop and get all of these enlarged to a size where you can fit one photo on a page of A3 size, leaving a margin of 5-6 cm on each edge. %26lt;---probably cheaper.
Alternatively, if you have a good scanner, scan each photo, enlarge it, and print it on photo paper using photography ink. This will be expensive, but you can customize with additional graphics, text, etc.
2. The paper should be A3, preferably hand-made paper. Decorate each page with nice margins in glitter pens. After pasting the photos, Write a nice caption / details about the photo.
3. The cover to be made especially beautiful, having a great font saying something like ';Best Friends Forever'; or ';Treasured memories from me to u'; or anything else you want. Try writing each alphabet in a different font, looks nice sometimes.
5. Stick a nice handwritten letter on plain paper on the last page, telling her about you great times and how much you will miss her.
6. Last page can be decorated with the signs of all her other good friends.
Hope you get a good gift to give. BTW, handmade gifts are always better.
U R her best friend right? so u must be knowing her likes/dislikes.well if i was in ur position then would have gifted her a small statue of God (can be any GOD, depends upon one's religion) according to me that can be the best gift one can offer to someone we like,no matter who they are to us:)
U can make a photo frame and stick the pic of the best moment u and ur spent together and with it write a sweet letter about how much ur friendship means
For hand made crafts go to this site
http://www.hitentertainment.com/artattac鈥?/a>
u will get loads of sweet stuff there.
Gift her a wrist watch by saying no matter where ever you go.... our time wl always same n this watch wl remind you my presence.
or
gift a digital photo frame, by adding sm of ur most memorable snaps. so it wl run as screen saver n remind her about ur frindships all gd time
I agree with Jane. Make a scrapbook. It'll be something that she can look at whenever she feels sad or homesick and she'll remember all the good times the two of you had together.
I would give her a nice friendship ornament with a friendship poem or a nice quote, telling her how much she meaning to you all this time.
make a photo album of memories.
fill it with pictures of you and her and some of you guys other friends!
-Hope I Helped.
Make her a scrapbook of all the photos you have of you two!
Answer Mine?
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;鈥?/a>
I would organize a nice collage picture frame of you and your friend.
I was going to say the same thing as Jane
make a photo frame of ur group .
i think jane has said it all
give her her fav thing or a thing which u both have shared 4 yrs
Need help! advice about things people want?
ok i need help
were having a silent auction at my school to raise money for a trip.
if you could bid on anything at an auction what would it be?
i need ideas (any answers that suggest a car, house, boat, etc. will be ignored)
thanks in advance!
[best answer gets 10 points]Need help! advice about things people want?
I know this sounds weird, but I have heard many people who swear up and down by candles!
They claim they're a hit!
-VM-Need help! advice about things people want?
Basket of cheer- donated wine,crackers and cheese
Cookie jar and cookies
Basket of bubbles bath products and sponges etc
movie tickets
Ball game tickets
Scented candles
Art supplies for kids
Movie CD popcorn and bowl
Chocolate Lovers Basket
Try an autographed something from someone you kids like.
a jersey from a hockey player, a program from a rock star's concert.
Hey, my kid got broken car body part signed by the race car driver
If you know someone who can cook, dinner party for ____ people is always popular.pink blush
were having a silent auction at my school to raise money for a trip.
if you could bid on anything at an auction what would it be?
i need ideas (any answers that suggest a car, house, boat, etc. will be ignored)
thanks in advance!
[best answer gets 10 points]Need help! advice about things people want?
I know this sounds weird, but I have heard many people who swear up and down by candles!
They claim they're a hit!
-VM-Need help! advice about things people want?
Basket of cheer- donated wine,crackers and cheese
Cookie jar and cookies
Basket of bubbles bath products and sponges etc
movie tickets
Ball game tickets
Scented candles
Art supplies for kids
Movie CD popcorn and bowl
Chocolate Lovers Basket
Try an autographed something from someone you kids like.
a jersey from a hockey player, a program from a rock star's concert.
Hey, my kid got broken car body part signed by the race car driver
If you know someone who can cook, dinner party for ____ people is always popular.
Married people only: Any advice to singles trying to find their ';true love';?
Preferrably the ones who are happily married.
How did you know that was the right person for you? What are some things you saw in them that made them different from others that that's why you married them? Pls, give me advice, what to do, what not to do ... Thanks.Married people only: Any advice to singles trying to find their ';true love';?
I`ve been married 14 yrs. this May. I think it has to do with how your personalities mesh. We are very comfortable around each other. It also has to do with respect. If you`ve set boundaries, do they respect them? Do you respect theirs? There`s no one answer to your question, you don`t want to be too picky, but you also don`t want to settle. You don`t want to be selfish, but you don`t want to be a doormat. If you meet someone, don`t leap in, long engagements are good.Married people only: Any advice to singles trying to find their ';true love';?
My belief is you should be friends with the person you choose to marry. My first husband and I were not friends, it was just a physical attraction and it only lasted 13 years of being together and 8 of those 13 I was married to him. Now my new husband and I have so much in common. He is fun to be with and I don't get bored being around him.
The day I met my husband I just looked into his eyes %26amp; I said to myself.....You are the one I will marry! Later that day he kissed me, I saw fire works, %26amp; I just knew right then %26amp; there he was the one!
How do you know you'll meet the right one? You just know it! I had asked my mother the same thing before she died %26amp; she told me, ';You'll know it when you see him'; She was 100% right!
Advice? BE YOURSELF!!! DON';T try to be someone your not! ALSO...............DON'T live together, i've seen too many of my friends marrages break up because they lived together before marriage, (of course this IS my own opinion) my hubby asked me if we could live together before marriage I told him NO, I said if you really %26amp; truly want me to be your wife, you'll wait for me %26amp; i'll do the same! We are now going on 7 years of marriage!
Dos:
1. Set your standards and qualifications.
2. Get to know the person and his family.
3. Go dating with the guy(preferably group dating with older person's supervision if you're not matured enough).
4. Only decide to make him your BF when you think he passed the standards and qualifications that you have set. This doesn't mean that he needs to attain a 100% score. You will have to set your own rating system to determine his real score. Remember: No one is PERFECT!!
Don'ts:
1. Deciding to make him your BF just because you think or feel that you love him. You need to study your feelings and think it over. Also, you need to study the guy.
2. Don't tell him your standards and qualifications. Keep it secret until you have finally judged him so that he cannot cheat.
How did you know that was the right person for you? What are some things you saw in them that made them different from others that that's why you married them? Pls, give me advice, what to do, what not to do ... Thanks.Married people only: Any advice to singles trying to find their ';true love';?
I`ve been married 14 yrs. this May. I think it has to do with how your personalities mesh. We are very comfortable around each other. It also has to do with respect. If you`ve set boundaries, do they respect them? Do you respect theirs? There`s no one answer to your question, you don`t want to be too picky, but you also don`t want to settle. You don`t want to be selfish, but you don`t want to be a doormat. If you meet someone, don`t leap in, long engagements are good.Married people only: Any advice to singles trying to find their ';true love';?
My belief is you should be friends with the person you choose to marry. My first husband and I were not friends, it was just a physical attraction and it only lasted 13 years of being together and 8 of those 13 I was married to him. Now my new husband and I have so much in common. He is fun to be with and I don't get bored being around him.
The day I met my husband I just looked into his eyes %26amp; I said to myself.....You are the one I will marry! Later that day he kissed me, I saw fire works, %26amp; I just knew right then %26amp; there he was the one!
How do you know you'll meet the right one? You just know it! I had asked my mother the same thing before she died %26amp; she told me, ';You'll know it when you see him'; She was 100% right!
Advice? BE YOURSELF!!! DON';T try to be someone your not! ALSO...............DON'T live together, i've seen too many of my friends marrages break up because they lived together before marriage, (of course this IS my own opinion) my hubby asked me if we could live together before marriage I told him NO, I said if you really %26amp; truly want me to be your wife, you'll wait for me %26amp; i'll do the same! We are now going on 7 years of marriage!
Dos:
1. Set your standards and qualifications.
2. Get to know the person and his family.
3. Go dating with the guy(preferably group dating with older person's supervision if you're not matured enough).
4. Only decide to make him your BF when you think he passed the standards and qualifications that you have set. This doesn't mean that he needs to attain a 100% score. You will have to set your own rating system to determine his real score. Remember: No one is PERFECT!!
Don'ts:
1. Deciding to make him your BF just because you think or feel that you love him. You need to study your feelings and think it over. Also, you need to study the guy.
2. Don't tell him your standards and qualifications. Keep it secret until you have finally judged him so that he cannot cheat.
Saturday, August 21, 2010
I'm so confused...and so sad..help? i need advice from people that are older and wiser?
I'm 16, and i found out that my bf broke up with me because he didnt see the reason in waiting for sex before marriage anymore and didnt' want to put me in a bad situation if he couldn't control his urges(he strongly believed in abstinence when we first started dating) and now he's dating his ex and he recently found out that she's ok with having sex before marriage and i'm so hurt because now he'll always remember her...now i'm so confused on my own beliefs and values. but i kno i'm not ready for sex..mostly the emotional aspect. and i'm just overwhelmed with sadness because sex brings people closer together..and now him and his gf will probably last a lonng time now if they do it...
any advice please?I'm so confused...and so sad..help? i need advice from people that are older and wiser?
Hello;
First I want to give you a big hurrah for not having sex with the boy -- you stuck to your guns and that took some real strength.
Now lets take a look at the problems you are facing ...
You shouldn't worry about how the boy will remember you. If you were kind to him and you had good times together -- he will remember you fondly (I still remember my 4th grade sweetheart -- she had the most wonderful strawberry blonde hair). consider that he is just one boy in a line of boys who will find you interesting and become your friends -- at 16 you are just beginning to be attractive.
You are confused about your beliefs and values -- my guess is that those beliefs and values are changing. In two or three years you will look back and say '; ... I was a child then ... I had childish ideas ... I am older now and I have a more mature understanding my ideas have changed ...'; The important thing at this time of your life is to make sure the people in your life are helping you to mature in a positive way (sounds like your family has done a good job so far).
The technical term for all this confusion and angst is ';Growing Up';.
For right now you seem to have your head on pretty straight in that you understand that you are not ready for sex.
I do want to explain a couple of things about sex that you need to know.
Men and women experience sex differently. It is not the same for a woman as it is for a man. Sex does not always bring people closer together. In fact the emotional strain of sex can destroy a relationship. Men may remember their first sex partner -- but often they don't really like them.
Best of luck,
BillI'm so confused...and so sad..help? i need advice from people that are older and wiser?
Stay strong in your beliefs! You can and will do it! Pray to God for guidance! He will help you stay strong in waiting, because I am telling you from experience, it will usually turn sour at such an early age. It is better to find a guy who can and will and wants to control his urges, because the guy can do it if he so chooses, and so can you :) Good job, I am sure God is very pleased to know you stood strong and did the right thing! Way to go!!! Find a guy who you like for who he is including his respect on marriage :) He is out there and good wishes! :)
Whose body is it any way?
It's yours, and you have the right to decide for yourself when you'll initiate sex or carry it through.
Values and beliefs may give you a reason for saying no, but the most important reason is that your body is your own.
If you don't feel ready for this sort of thing, put it off.
Put it off for as long as you feel uncomfortable.
Although I agree with religious conservatives who want to challenge the youth to delay sexual activity for a while, I totally disagree with their message that a condom is a provision for sin. I send my Christian friends to the website below which debunks the whole thing against premarital sex in the Bible. That way they have no excuse not to support comprehensive sex education.
Don't worry about him and stick to your beliefs, you have a long road ahead of you and alot of life to live and some day you will fine someone who believes the same way you do
any advice please?I'm so confused...and so sad..help? i need advice from people that are older and wiser?
Hello;
First I want to give you a big hurrah for not having sex with the boy -- you stuck to your guns and that took some real strength.
Now lets take a look at the problems you are facing ...
You shouldn't worry about how the boy will remember you. If you were kind to him and you had good times together -- he will remember you fondly (I still remember my 4th grade sweetheart -- she had the most wonderful strawberry blonde hair). consider that he is just one boy in a line of boys who will find you interesting and become your friends -- at 16 you are just beginning to be attractive.
You are confused about your beliefs and values -- my guess is that those beliefs and values are changing. In two or three years you will look back and say '; ... I was a child then ... I had childish ideas ... I am older now and I have a more mature understanding my ideas have changed ...'; The important thing at this time of your life is to make sure the people in your life are helping you to mature in a positive way (sounds like your family has done a good job so far).
The technical term for all this confusion and angst is ';Growing Up';.
For right now you seem to have your head on pretty straight in that you understand that you are not ready for sex.
I do want to explain a couple of things about sex that you need to know.
Men and women experience sex differently. It is not the same for a woman as it is for a man. Sex does not always bring people closer together. In fact the emotional strain of sex can destroy a relationship. Men may remember their first sex partner -- but often they don't really like them.
Best of luck,
BillI'm so confused...and so sad..help? i need advice from people that are older and wiser?
Stay strong in your beliefs! You can and will do it! Pray to God for guidance! He will help you stay strong in waiting, because I am telling you from experience, it will usually turn sour at such an early age. It is better to find a guy who can and will and wants to control his urges, because the guy can do it if he so chooses, and so can you :) Good job, I am sure God is very pleased to know you stood strong and did the right thing! Way to go!!! Find a guy who you like for who he is including his respect on marriage :) He is out there and good wishes! :)
Whose body is it any way?
It's yours, and you have the right to decide for yourself when you'll initiate sex or carry it through.
Values and beliefs may give you a reason for saying no, but the most important reason is that your body is your own.
If you don't feel ready for this sort of thing, put it off.
Put it off for as long as you feel uncomfortable.
Although I agree with religious conservatives who want to challenge the youth to delay sexual activity for a while, I totally disagree with their message that a condom is a provision for sin. I send my Christian friends to the website below which debunks the whole thing against premarital sex in the Bible. That way they have no excuse not to support comprehensive sex education.
Don't worry about him and stick to your beliefs, you have a long road ahead of you and alot of life to live and some day you will fine someone who believes the same way you do
How do I identify if a girl that I like is dating some other people? Anyone can give some good advice?
Hi everyone,
Just a question that I had been pondering over months. How do I know by observation or identify if a girl that I like has a boyfriend or is dating some other guy? It isn't that I do not trust her, but I just don't want to end up spoiling other people's relationship and getting heart breaks.
Is there a way to see how they behave or how they are like?
Thanks.How do I identify if a girl that I like is dating some other people? Anyone can give some good advice?
Are you sure she is dating someone else ?
If no than get all this scrap out of your mind.
Trust herHow do I identify if a girl that I like is dating some other people? Anyone can give some good advice?
Ask her out for dinner. If she says she's seeing someone else, tell her that's a shame and that he's a lucky guy. Then tell her that if things don't work out, to give you a call and meet for drinks.
This way you find out if she is with someone or not and you also let your interest be known.
You don't really know because people can lie about it. Even if you see her kiss another guy, they might not be dating, but are friends with benefits. It's not a question about whether or not she's dating other people or not, it's whether or not she is totally into you only, and no one else, regardless of what she calls her other ';friendships.'; You can ask her and see if she's up front. Take her word for it at first and watch her behavior. If she genuinely likes only you, then bingo. If you see her do obvious things that clearly insinuate that she has feelings (mentally or physically, or both) for someone else, then you know she's not fully feeling it for you entirely.
EDIT: Example, I met a girl once who I dated and she used to claim she loved me, I was the only one for her, etc, but every now and then she would talk about her last boyfriend in a way that insinuated that she still only sees him as her special guy. She would deny wanting him every time, but her actions (her open feelings in her speach about him) was more truth than her denials. In the end, I dumped her, and low-and-behold she went right back to her ex. A few months later she calls me and said she made a mistake to let me go, and admitted to still having serious feelings for her ex while we were dating, meaning when she told me I was the only guy for her, she lied.
Point is, believe nothing, question everything, see undeniable facts, not jaded opinions and empty words and you'll get the truth if your not jaded your self.
ask her
look her up on myspace, you should be able to tell.
no. ask her. she won't freak out and break up with him for you. you won't ruin a relationship if she doesn't like you. we don't behave a certain way if we are dating someone. we don't walk funny, or something....weird question....
Just a question that I had been pondering over months. How do I know by observation or identify if a girl that I like has a boyfriend or is dating some other guy? It isn't that I do not trust her, but I just don't want to end up spoiling other people's relationship and getting heart breaks.
Is there a way to see how they behave or how they are like?
Thanks.How do I identify if a girl that I like is dating some other people? Anyone can give some good advice?
Are you sure she is dating someone else ?
If no than get all this scrap out of your mind.
Trust herHow do I identify if a girl that I like is dating some other people? Anyone can give some good advice?
Ask her out for dinner. If she says she's seeing someone else, tell her that's a shame and that he's a lucky guy. Then tell her that if things don't work out, to give you a call and meet for drinks.
This way you find out if she is with someone or not and you also let your interest be known.
You don't really know because people can lie about it. Even if you see her kiss another guy, they might not be dating, but are friends with benefits. It's not a question about whether or not she's dating other people or not, it's whether or not she is totally into you only, and no one else, regardless of what she calls her other ';friendships.'; You can ask her and see if she's up front. Take her word for it at first and watch her behavior. If she genuinely likes only you, then bingo. If you see her do obvious things that clearly insinuate that she has feelings (mentally or physically, or both) for someone else, then you know she's not fully feeling it for you entirely.
EDIT: Example, I met a girl once who I dated and she used to claim she loved me, I was the only one for her, etc, but every now and then she would talk about her last boyfriend in a way that insinuated that she still only sees him as her special guy. She would deny wanting him every time, but her actions (her open feelings in her speach about him) was more truth than her denials. In the end, I dumped her, and low-and-behold she went right back to her ex. A few months later she calls me and said she made a mistake to let me go, and admitted to still having serious feelings for her ex while we were dating, meaning when she told me I was the only guy for her, she lied.
Point is, believe nothing, question everything, see undeniable facts, not jaded opinions and empty words and you'll get the truth if your not jaded your self.
ask her
look her up on myspace, you should be able to tell.
no. ask her. she won't freak out and break up with him for you. you won't ruin a relationship if she doesn't like you. we don't behave a certain way if we are dating someone. we don't walk funny, or something....weird question....
Renting privately for people entitled to housing benefits - advice needed?
I have been applying for council properties for 2 1/2 years but due to the band I am in (I am unable to work due to a disability and live with parents but need my own space, at age 29) - not come close to being offered a property. I am now looking at the private sector, can people give me advice on hidden costs, things I need to be aware of, certains things I may be able to get help with due to being on Income Support/Severe Disablement Allowance/DLA - also any snags etc. and I already know not many landlords like tenants on housing benefit!!Renting privately for people entitled to housing benefits - advice needed?
If I knew what area you are in I could help more. A lot of councils work on a bidding system, you like a property they advertise on their website and you bid for it. Snag is, if it is a nice place in a nice area, the world and his mother bids.
In the event of a tie, they look at how many points you have.
Living at home won't help you because the council will consider you adequately housed and parents aren't likely to throw a disabled daughter out.
Make sure that you are to be nominated for housing association property via the council list. A lot do not accept applications unless you are registered with the council.
Start ringing the council on a regular basis, keep a pressure on them.
Also ask them if they operate a scheme where they help you with deposits to rent in the private sector, some do. Bristol is one.
Not all landlords refuse HB. The council will have a list of accredited landlords who may accept you.Renting privately for people entitled to housing benefits - advice needed?
I found it easier putting a months rent and a months deposit to one side - then i approached landlords telling them approx how long the council would take to sort out my claim and that I would pay a months rent in advance to show good faith! There are a lot of them out there that dont like DSS because they have to wait a few weeks for their money and they still have mortgages to pay. The other pitfall is that because your claiming DLA as well, you will have to pay something towards both your rent and your council tax - it wont be much but you will have to pay some
The private sector is fine as long as you can afford it as rent/council tax benefit payments will usually only be partially met and there is precious little security of tenure.
Your local Housing Associations coupled with a request for help from Adult Social care are well worth looking into and really should be your first port of call along with a visit to CAB.
As for Laying it on thick'; as another contributor suggested - well in this day and age a person's got to do what a person's got to do as believe me it's a dog eat dog world out there.(8 years wait for me).
Wish you the best of good fortune - Rock on.
Some landlords prefer housing benefit claimants, depends on the persons circumstances, the good thing is that the cheque is always there, my friend emailed 10 agents explaining her details and got good response from 4, also was offered 3 houses where they were high quality and the landlord was cool with housing benefit, bad points are that you may have to stand up to 3 months rent counting your month in advance as the benefit office can be slow also u may have to pay an agency fee of 100 pounds and u need a bank account and references, any shortfall in rent has to come from you and is based on the property ie a 2 bed semi detached worth rent of say 550 a month - you may get 280 towards it so the cheaper the rent the better, something like a flat would be a better scenario.
Oh some landlords do a credit cheque with Experian now.
Have u tried the local private housing associations? we have a few here in stoke on trent that accept benefits and provide nice apartments so maybe u have them there too?
Regarding benefit help u can get mobility allowance for a car if u r bad enough or the cash which is about 160 per month, that's from blackpool office also incapacity and extra for help with cooking if you are in danger of dropping a saucepan etc
Landlords do not usually mind people like yourself, or retired people on housing benefit. You are disabled and they view that differently, so you will be welcomed by most.
If you rent through a letting agent the costs can be high initially.
They usually charge a setting up fee. The cost varies but could be something like 拢150.
You usually need to pay one months rent in advance and a deposit.The deposit is often another months rent.
Very often the rent on private property is higher than council.
You may find that housing benefit will not cover all your rent.
The council do not usually assist with the deposit or month in advance.
You could check with the benefits office to find out what you would be entitled to because it varies from area to area.!!!!!
get yourself some good character refs, the only difference is that the rent tends to be higher. another possibility is to get social services in on the act and get em to push the council to house you. play on it with the old its getting me down living with my parents routine. get the doctors help, anyone you can think of, councillor, anyone, go around and look for empty council propertys and apply for them. its what i did and was housed within two wks. you just need to bug em until thier sick of you and house you.
Some landlords don't like housing benefit because it is paid in arrears, not because of the person!
You will need a deposit which is usually one mths rent , you may also need a mth in advance ( some do not ask people on benefits for this ) and then if it is through an estate agents some require an admin fee for the drawing up of a tenancy agreement between 拢50 and 拢100. It can be better going through an agent because then you know its all above board.
Once you move in you will be responsible for all the bills etc, the landlord only pays the buildings insurance.
Very few estate agents will let to housing benefit claimants where i live. So there is only the local papers to go by. Most private landlords i have come across in 24 years of renting have been either rude, arrogant, pompous or interfering. Sad but true! Best landlord I ever had was a Jew by the way. There is a new scheme starting now where the deposit has to be safeguarded. It's a very small step in the right direction.
However, if you're disabled there must be ways to make the system work for you. I know of someone who managed to get her own 1 bed ground floor flat with disabled parking bay after messing her hips up on a bender. They did section her though after the bender. Like i said, the system can be worked ... good luck.
A lot of private landlords don't accept people on benefits . All so you would have to pay up front a months rent and a deposit usually similar amount to the rent. You would require references. The tenancy will only be for 6 months or less to begin with . You could love the house and area but then the landlord could decide to not carry on the contract . Also benefits might not cover all your rent even if you entitled to full benefit . You should get a pre determination done on the rent of any property first . Basically it lets you know what they will allow you rent money wise .
I do understand the frustrations with trying to get a council property as I used to work for my local council office. I think renting private has some pros and cons . Least privately you can decide to live where you want to as oppose to where the council place you .
Have you tried housing associations and the citizens advice bureau as they could help ?
I wish i lived where u do because in atlanta all they want is houseing for one reason - they can get 1200 a mo for a two bedroom house -
my suggsetion to you is to call hud ( houseing urban development ) they may help you and they pay part of your payment - or section 8 - houseing vouchers for people with disabilities, kids, ( kind of like the fema thing ) your ss office should b able to direct you to some of these places - or even your dept of labor - or defax ( department family child services ) if you are disabled you should qualify for all of these things -
so,a benefits scrounger eh?
If I knew what area you are in I could help more. A lot of councils work on a bidding system, you like a property they advertise on their website and you bid for it. Snag is, if it is a nice place in a nice area, the world and his mother bids.
In the event of a tie, they look at how many points you have.
Living at home won't help you because the council will consider you adequately housed and parents aren't likely to throw a disabled daughter out.
Make sure that you are to be nominated for housing association property via the council list. A lot do not accept applications unless you are registered with the council.
Start ringing the council on a regular basis, keep a pressure on them.
Also ask them if they operate a scheme where they help you with deposits to rent in the private sector, some do. Bristol is one.
Not all landlords refuse HB. The council will have a list of accredited landlords who may accept you.Renting privately for people entitled to housing benefits - advice needed?
I found it easier putting a months rent and a months deposit to one side - then i approached landlords telling them approx how long the council would take to sort out my claim and that I would pay a months rent in advance to show good faith! There are a lot of them out there that dont like DSS because they have to wait a few weeks for their money and they still have mortgages to pay. The other pitfall is that because your claiming DLA as well, you will have to pay something towards both your rent and your council tax - it wont be much but you will have to pay some
The private sector is fine as long as you can afford it as rent/council tax benefit payments will usually only be partially met and there is precious little security of tenure.
Your local Housing Associations coupled with a request for help from Adult Social care are well worth looking into and really should be your first port of call along with a visit to CAB.
As for Laying it on thick'; as another contributor suggested - well in this day and age a person's got to do what a person's got to do as believe me it's a dog eat dog world out there.(8 years wait for me).
Wish you the best of good fortune - Rock on.
Some landlords prefer housing benefit claimants, depends on the persons circumstances, the good thing is that the cheque is always there, my friend emailed 10 agents explaining her details and got good response from 4, also was offered 3 houses where they were high quality and the landlord was cool with housing benefit, bad points are that you may have to stand up to 3 months rent counting your month in advance as the benefit office can be slow also u may have to pay an agency fee of 100 pounds and u need a bank account and references, any shortfall in rent has to come from you and is based on the property ie a 2 bed semi detached worth rent of say 550 a month - you may get 280 towards it so the cheaper the rent the better, something like a flat would be a better scenario.
Oh some landlords do a credit cheque with Experian now.
Have u tried the local private housing associations? we have a few here in stoke on trent that accept benefits and provide nice apartments so maybe u have them there too?
Regarding benefit help u can get mobility allowance for a car if u r bad enough or the cash which is about 160 per month, that's from blackpool office also incapacity and extra for help with cooking if you are in danger of dropping a saucepan etc
Landlords do not usually mind people like yourself, or retired people on housing benefit. You are disabled and they view that differently, so you will be welcomed by most.
If you rent through a letting agent the costs can be high initially.
They usually charge a setting up fee. The cost varies but could be something like 拢150.
You usually need to pay one months rent in advance and a deposit.The deposit is often another months rent.
Very often the rent on private property is higher than council.
You may find that housing benefit will not cover all your rent.
The council do not usually assist with the deposit or month in advance.
You could check with the benefits office to find out what you would be entitled to because it varies from area to area.!!!!!
get yourself some good character refs, the only difference is that the rent tends to be higher. another possibility is to get social services in on the act and get em to push the council to house you. play on it with the old its getting me down living with my parents routine. get the doctors help, anyone you can think of, councillor, anyone, go around and look for empty council propertys and apply for them. its what i did and was housed within two wks. you just need to bug em until thier sick of you and house you.
Some landlords don't like housing benefit because it is paid in arrears, not because of the person!
You will need a deposit which is usually one mths rent , you may also need a mth in advance ( some do not ask people on benefits for this ) and then if it is through an estate agents some require an admin fee for the drawing up of a tenancy agreement between 拢50 and 拢100. It can be better going through an agent because then you know its all above board.
Once you move in you will be responsible for all the bills etc, the landlord only pays the buildings insurance.
Very few estate agents will let to housing benefit claimants where i live. So there is only the local papers to go by. Most private landlords i have come across in 24 years of renting have been either rude, arrogant, pompous or interfering. Sad but true! Best landlord I ever had was a Jew by the way. There is a new scheme starting now where the deposit has to be safeguarded. It's a very small step in the right direction.
However, if you're disabled there must be ways to make the system work for you. I know of someone who managed to get her own 1 bed ground floor flat with disabled parking bay after messing her hips up on a bender. They did section her though after the bender. Like i said, the system can be worked ... good luck.
A lot of private landlords don't accept people on benefits . All so you would have to pay up front a months rent and a deposit usually similar amount to the rent. You would require references. The tenancy will only be for 6 months or less to begin with . You could love the house and area but then the landlord could decide to not carry on the contract . Also benefits might not cover all your rent even if you entitled to full benefit . You should get a pre determination done on the rent of any property first . Basically it lets you know what they will allow you rent money wise .
I do understand the frustrations with trying to get a council property as I used to work for my local council office. I think renting private has some pros and cons . Least privately you can decide to live where you want to as oppose to where the council place you .
Have you tried housing associations and the citizens advice bureau as they could help ?
I wish i lived where u do because in atlanta all they want is houseing for one reason - they can get 1200 a mo for a two bedroom house -
my suggsetion to you is to call hud ( houseing urban development ) they may help you and they pay part of your payment - or section 8 - houseing vouchers for people with disabilities, kids, ( kind of like the fema thing ) your ss office should b able to direct you to some of these places - or even your dept of labor - or defax ( department family child services ) if you are disabled you should qualify for all of these things -
so,a benefits scrounger eh?
I realy Need Some People's advice?
My wife and I have been married for About 8 years. Now we are going through some serious trouble. I think she is cheating on me, the problem is that I think she is being tricked into this. we were having some troubles and I think during this time some one relized this and took advantage of the situation. The real problem is now that it has stsrted every time i approch her about it she gets defensive it starts a fight and the problem gets worse. How do I tell her That I want to understand, Everybody Makes mistakes.. I am loosing My marriage because I cant give my wife what she needs. But how can I give her what she needs While he is envolved.I realy Need Some People's advice?
Get counselling. If she refuses to go, then go alone.
How does one get 'tricked' into sleeping with someone else? I'm sure a lot of people here would like to know. She made a choice, it was a bad one, you need to talk about it. It seems that you have forgiven her for cheating which is very noble and strong of you, but you still need to talk to her to find out what is wrong and how to improve your marriage. If she refuses, then things can never get better.
Think about some of the things that she has complained about in the past and start there. Things like picking up after yourself, or washing the dishes, or not watching tv all the time and paying her more attention. She's probably mentioned stuff before. Try to remember them and start there.I realy Need Some People's advice?
Ask her if she wants to save the marriage. If she does, start marriage counseling. By the way, no one is ';tricked'; into having an affair!
Your wife may be crying out for something. Has the intimacy stopped in your marriage?? And by intimacy, I mean have you stopped sharing things, going places together, just enjoying each others company even if it's watching a program on tv.. If you feel you can't talk to your wife because she gets defensive, maybe you could try writing her a letter.. That seems to work in my relationship.. She may be able to write to you what she wants to say rather than say it to you.. Why some women are like this I don't know, but trust me, it's worth a shot....
wake up buddy, no one cheats unless they want too, they don't get tricked into it!!!!
Sounds as though you're in denial. Tricked? I don't think so.....
Try marriage counseling...even if you have to go it alone...doesn't sound like she's interested in saving your marriage. Can't be one sided......
Marriage/relationship has to be 100% commitment from both people 100% of the time.. She's not commited.
How long are you gonna continue to let her walk on your feelings? Have some pride... she's making you look foolish!
You need to do some real investigative work and find out for sure if she is cheating on you. If she is (or was) and lied to you then I think you need to call it quits.
If not, you need to find out why you are in the boat you are in. Probably the point in your marriage we all go through in the 5-10 year range where people become a little frustrated. Some marriages survive, some do not. Good luck.
You need to just sit her down, be brutally honest with her, and beg her to come clean with you. You need to know what each others intentions are and to work out a game plan of how you can fix these issues. If you arent both willing to do this, file the papers and move on!facebooks
Get counselling. If she refuses to go, then go alone.
How does one get 'tricked' into sleeping with someone else? I'm sure a lot of people here would like to know. She made a choice, it was a bad one, you need to talk about it. It seems that you have forgiven her for cheating which is very noble and strong of you, but you still need to talk to her to find out what is wrong and how to improve your marriage. If she refuses, then things can never get better.
Think about some of the things that she has complained about in the past and start there. Things like picking up after yourself, or washing the dishes, or not watching tv all the time and paying her more attention. She's probably mentioned stuff before. Try to remember them and start there.I realy Need Some People's advice?
Ask her if she wants to save the marriage. If she does, start marriage counseling. By the way, no one is ';tricked'; into having an affair!
Your wife may be crying out for something. Has the intimacy stopped in your marriage?? And by intimacy, I mean have you stopped sharing things, going places together, just enjoying each others company even if it's watching a program on tv.. If you feel you can't talk to your wife because she gets defensive, maybe you could try writing her a letter.. That seems to work in my relationship.. She may be able to write to you what she wants to say rather than say it to you.. Why some women are like this I don't know, but trust me, it's worth a shot....
wake up buddy, no one cheats unless they want too, they don't get tricked into it!!!!
Sounds as though you're in denial. Tricked? I don't think so.....
Try marriage counseling...even if you have to go it alone...doesn't sound like she's interested in saving your marriage. Can't be one sided......
Marriage/relationship has to be 100% commitment from both people 100% of the time.. She's not commited.
How long are you gonna continue to let her walk on your feelings? Have some pride... she's making you look foolish!
You need to do some real investigative work and find out for sure if she is cheating on you. If she is (or was) and lied to you then I think you need to call it quits.
If not, you need to find out why you are in the boat you are in. Probably the point in your marriage we all go through in the 5-10 year range where people become a little frustrated. Some marriages survive, some do not. Good luck.
You need to just sit her down, be brutally honest with her, and beg her to come clean with you. You need to know what each others intentions are and to work out a game plan of how you can fix these issues. If you arent both willing to do this, file the papers and move on!
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